Barely Innocent
by kaosgurl00
Summary: Bella's life is a tragedy. Her mother died when she was 12, and now her life is drowned in Charlie's abuse and drugs. When Edward comes, will she endanger his life by falling in love? Or will she protect him and his heart? Rated M for mature themes.
1. Prologue

**Okay, so because of my passion for writing, and my new free time, I am going to attempt and story, not a one-shot. It is dreary, but it has some of my personal experiences in it, so it is not hard to make up something out of the blue. Anyway… onward!**

**Prologue**

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I stared the white powder back in the face. It haunted me. The fine substance could not get out of my mind ever since _his_ party. It was a simple 12-year-old birthday party, but it turned less than innocent when Tyler's big brother showed up. David,

I shuddered at his name. The evil gleam in his eye when he offered pre-teens something that could ruin their lives. The look of satisfaction when I took my first hit. Almost of triumph.

At first, I didn't want to take it, for I knew what it was, after seeing my mother snort it. The look of pain but relief in her face made me know not to take it, that it was dangerous, but peer pressure got the best of me. I folded under their teasing. I just wanted to fit in.

The dollar bill rolled up slid in easy. The worst part was the first hit. I didn't know what to expect. It burned. It burned like no other, but strangely, I wanted to do it again. A feeling of relief washed over me as I felt my shoulders lift, as if there was a 100 pound weight lifted off of them. For once I felt free.

I will never forget the high I first got. I was soaring from my problems. From Renée, from Charlie, from school, from Alice.

Alice. How I was glad that she had to sick with the flu and couldn't come to the party. I never wanted her to get in my problems. We both had enough now is it was. For her to have the extra burden like me would be harder for her. Something I tried to protect her from.

Now, 6 years later, I was in more trouble than I ever imagined. Renee had died in a car crash when I was twelve. That was what started the spark of Charlie's hate against me. He blamed it on Alice and I. If she had never gone out to get the stupid ice cream for my school party; she would never have died.

It was my entire fault. I accepted it. That was the same way he felt, but he vented his frustrations through me. A horror I never though I would process. But here I am, covered in scars and bruises. My physical and mental composure damaged in never healing scars. One of the many more reasons cocaine and marijuana was my escape. My only time I was free from Charlie's wrath.

And I intended to keep it that way. But when he showed up. I didn't know what to do.

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**So hi again, this is another attempt at a story. i hope it goes well. i will try to update 3 times a week, and if that gets to hard, then twice. so please bare with me. i will have the next chapter up later up tonight. i dont mind flames. but, please help with constructive criticism!! i love it and nee it!**

**by the way, if someone could help me with pools. i have no idea how to get one my profile. so if someone could tell me, that would be great.**

**-Avery**


	2. Chapter 1

I awoke covered in a light layer of sweat. It was another of those dreams. The ones that made my life a living hell, sleeping or not. They were dreams of Charlie. They would start out where he was genuine and caring, but instantly turn into the raging monster that he is now.

I examined the evidence myself. I had blue and purple marks down my arms. Almost like welts. Blood crusted my upper arm where he had stomped on my shoulder. I knew I had to shower off before Alice saw it.

She rarely got beaten. I was the trouble child. He saw Alice as an angel, and I wanted to keep it that way. No one should have to go through what I do. So I always made an effort to not let her see it. It was my pain and mine only. I slowly stretched and climbed off the bed.

My muscles were every sore. I could feel some of the old cuts opening. The rusty smell got to my nose. I had learned to deal with the smell, and learn not to faint, but it still didn't mean I liked it. Slowly but surely, I made my way across the hall, tiptoeing so Charlie didn't wake up.

As I got in the shower, the hot water instantly relaxed my muscles. This was the one part of the day I enjoyed. The water running down my body gave a me sense of peace that not even drugs could give me. I washed my hair quickly, knowing that if I wasted hot water, I didn't want to see the consequences. I got out, and looked away from the mirror over the sink. I avoided mirrors at all costs. I knew what I saw. It wasn't pretty, and I didn't like it. But I knew, in this case, I needed to. The scars on my back were nearly healed. I flinched in pain, remembering the incident.

_"Bella!" he roared. His face was purple with anger. I knew it was bad. His face was usually red, but when it was purple, I may have written my death sentence. "Why on this god forsaken earth is my dinner not made?" he screamed at me. I mentally smacked myself on the head. I knew I forgot something. The schoolwork load was more than ever, and I had just finished when he came home, smelling like beer and cigarettes. _

_I knew an excuse would do no good. That would just make him angrier. Saying how I was such a whiner, and he put food and a roof over my head. I should be thankful. Thankful my ass. I would rather sleep outside in a barn than sleep in this hellhole. But he continued to yell at me. Screaming obscenities. I wish Alice didn't have to hear. She knew the treatment I got. She cared with her whole heart, but I made a sisterly promise to her not to tell. I couldn't risk her getting hurt. She was too precious and fragile for that. Instead, I just took the beating. If I reacted, he liked it, and hit harder. That was the day he pulled the knife for the first time._

I shuddered, not wanting to relive the memory. The cuts on my back brought enough. The way his knife sliced through my skin like butter. When the cries escaped my lips on accident, fueling his anger. His grunts of satisfaction when he finished with the bloody skin, making crosses on my back. I was so up in the memory, I jumped a mile in the air when Alice knocked on the bathroom door. I quickly bandaged up what needed, and slipped through. Alice knew my morning ritual. She was ashamed. I felt so bad.

Instantly, out of habit, I raced down the stairs to make breakfast. I tripped on the last trip and came face to face with Mr. Floor. Someone I have come to known for a while. Pushing up stretched the sore muscles, and I winced. Brushing my tush off, I continued my pace.

After 15 fast minutes, I had steaming waffles with fruit toppings lying on the table. I heard thumping on the stairs. I froze. That meant Charlie. Alice would never do something as ungraceful. He looked around, looking for a flaw. I had already made sure there were none. He shrugged, finding everything perfect.

I sighed in relief. Not on the first day of school.

Oh how I hated the first day of school. Everyone staring at you, people asking questions, it just made me nervous. "I will be right by you." Alice whispered in my ear as we walked up the stairs after getting out of her Porsche. I was used to the gawks and stares by now. They still didn't seem welcome. We quietly made our way to English. Only catching a gawk by a nerd, and stare by a jock. I knew that they were only staring at Alice.

What could I say? She was gorgeous. She has small pixey features with spiky black hair. She was her own person. I knew none was staring at me. What was I? I was a plain jane. Skinny, looking unhealthy. Snow white skin that stood out. Unruly mud brown hair, to go along with my mud brown eyes.

I had curves, but because of my scars, I was forced to cover skin up. So I looked like a nobody. Alice always told me I beautiful. But what did she know? She was my sister. She was supposed to say that. She had almost every guy after her, and I was just a shadow.

When we got to first period, I looked around the classroom. Our favorite table in the back was filled. I looked closer and wished I had not. There in my seat was a Greek god. I couldn't believe it. His face was chiseled to perfection. His skin looked smooth as silk just from here, I couldn't wait to run my hands over_-wait Bella. You are getting in too far. You don't even know the guy and you are already fantasizing about him._

I focused on his other features. He has messy bronze hair. In the light, it gleamed with brightness I though only the sun could achieve. And then I looked into his eyes. I was instantly lost. His emerald green eyes had me caught in a deadly trap that I didn't want anyone to save me from. They were liquid green, filled with warmth and trust. I knew I was lost. I was captivated by the Greek god in front of me.

I couldn't move. I hardly noted a pulling of my arm and a high pitched shrieking of my name. I broke from my trance reluctantly. I looked down at my disturbance. She was smirking up at me. I raised an eyebrow. What was she so cocky about? She shot a pointed look in the god's direction and I understood.

She was trying to get me to date for ages. She knew Charlie would never allow it. He didn't even let Alice out. There was no way in hell he would let me go. I ignored her and sat down in the front row. She continued to gaze but I didn't look back I knew if I looked, I would get caught. Throughout the lesson, she shot me looks and smirks. I knew what was on her mind, and it was not going to happen.

Even if I could, who could love me? I was used and broken. I had one peace of innocence left, but that was it. I had killed my mother, and my father's soul. I was a horrible person. As I continued to wallow, I didn't notice Alice waving over the people. I turned around, ready to go to the next class, and ran smack dab into a rock hard chest. My face went bright red. Alice had planned this. I looked up to see two green orbs staring down at me. My face flushed again. I ran over the man of my dreams, and I couldn't even form a coherent sentence. I felt incredibly stupid.

Finally I open my moth "Um. Hi I'm Bella." Could I be even more dorkier? I sounded like a total loser. He chuckled. It was a sound sent from the heavens. "Hi, my name is Edward Cullen." Said a silky voice. Forget the laughter, this voice was smooth as silk and velvet. I almost melted.

"So yeah hi…" I left the rest up to him. I didn't trust myself with speech right now. " So what is your next class period?" he asked. "Spanish." I blurted out. My face filled with blood. He chuckled again. He checked his schedule. Surely to check that he didn't have it with me. A crooked grin filled his face. "So do I. Do you want to walk together?" His face went nervous. Why? I thought. Why would he be nervous?

"Sure" I answered. I snapped back into reality. I looked around. We were in an empty classroom. "Oops, I guess we lost track of time" I laughed nervously. I felt so stupid! I was keeping him from class. I turned back to his perfect face. I blushed. He was staring intently at my face. Was I that ugly?

I pulled some of my hair to the corner of my face. I had to make sure that that bruise was covered. It was. I sighed in relief. His voice shook me from my thoughts. "So we should probably get going." "Yeah" I answered. He grabbed my hand we started walking. I was stiff. He grabbed my hand. His touch sent fire shooting up my arm. I couldn't believe he took my hand.

We walked out of the classroom. That was when the questions began. " So have you lived in forks all of your life?" I laughed, glad that he started the conversation. "No. My family moved from Phoenix when I was 8. What about you?" I mentally cursed myself. Of course not! He just moved here! He chuckled again. Oh how I loved that sound. "No I just moved here from Alaska. My dad is a doctor, and travels around. But he promised this would be the last move for a while."

That was nice of his dad. So that he could make friends. "Cool, so I'm glad. Although that means you will be bothering me for longer, but I don't mind." I winked at him. I gasped in my head. Where was all of this confidence coming from? Not that I minded though… He mocked hurt. I contained a giggled. "And here I thought I was being charming" he scoffed. I couldn't hold my giggle any longer. I burst out. And soon we were both doubled over in hysterics.

After several calming breaths, he looked around suspiciously. I giggled again. "Do you absolutely feel the need to go to Spanish? I mean we live in the north." It took me a second, but I caught on. Skip Spanish? Could I do it? Would I? But than when was the last time I have some fun? I nodded. "Hell yeah! Lets get the heck out of here." I took his hand and ran out the front doors. It was a regular Forks day. Grey, misty, and of course, gloomy. I lead him over to the trees against the side of the school. "Over here they can't see us, but we can get back in time." I told him. He nodded understandably.

I sat down, wincing when my sores pulled, but he didn't notice. Yet. "So do you have any brothers or sisters?" I asked, trying to break the silence. He sighed, hopefully in relief. "I have three. Emmett and Jasper are my brothers and Rose is my sister. We are all adopted." I was tried to keep the conversation going. "What are they like? C'mon. I want some embarrassing stuff " he grinned again. My exact wanted reaction.

"Well, Emmett is a huge teddy bear. He is really strong, but also like a pillow. He is the funny one of the family. You got an awkward silence; he either makes them or destroys them. Jasper is…… Jasper is Jasper. He is very charismatic. Like when you are around him, you can't help but feel calm. And last but not least, Rosalie is pigheaded, vain, selfish and shallow. That is the best way to describe her. Only with Emmett she opens up." I was taking it all in, when I heard the bit about rose and Emmett. Where they together?

Edward saw my confusion and quickly cleared it up. "Emmett and Rosalie are together. We are all adopted, so our parents don't have a problem. I must say, they compliment themselves very well. They are both very physical people." I noticed when he talked about his parents. They lit up in what only could be love and adoration. I nodded. I understood. They had to blood barrier, so what should block them from their hearts? "What about your parents? You speak of them very highly." He looked at me curiously. Maybe seeing the wince when he talked about his perfect family. I wasn't jealous of him. Just thankful that he had a good one. He was too nice to have one like mine.

I simply winced when I remembered the good days. And how different they are from now. He answered my question. "I can't believe you notice. Most people don't. Most people think I resent them I guess because they think I push them away. They are the exact opposite. My real parents died when I was just a year old. I don't miss them. I don't have a reason too. I guess I never got attached. Carlisle and Esme are the best. For handling 4 teenage children they do, they do a spectacular job." He paused for a second, his green orbs glazing over with memories.

"You know it was Carlisle that saved me? It was him. We were in a car accident and he was the doctor at the scene. He was on his way to the hospital for his shift when he saw us. He called 911 and instantly took care of us." His eyes immediately cleared up. They were happy. "He always joked that I was the reason that he is where he is. He says that if it wasn't for me, his colleagues would never have taken him seriously, and when he saved me, they saw him in a new light."

He laughed and looked down at me. The intensity of his gaze would have made me collapse if I was standing. But now they just made me trapped. They were filled with love and admiration. A squirrel hopped 5 feet away. I could kill the intruding thing. It has broken our moment. I don't know how long, but I was falling in his eyes.

"So what about you? Tell me about your family?" I flinched about at the word. I think he noticed this time, but he didn't say anything thankfully. "Well, what is there much to tell? Alice is my sister. She is spunky in her own way. Never lets me out of the house in something not from this season's fashion. But I love her none the less. I think she was checking out that brother of yours." I winked. Jasper was so an Alice type. Someone to calm the pixie down. He laughed his musical laugh. "So I wasn't the only one that saw it?" I shook my head. "Nope, I think she was mentally undressing him, but that is just me." At that we both doubled over laughing on the ground.

Alice had her eyes all over that poor boy. I felt bad for him. Once we had a hold of ourselves, Edward used my calf to stable himself.

I hissed in pain. That was where Charlie had stomped on my leg last night. It was a good thing my jeans covered it. My ankle was wrapped up because of the cuts. He misinterpreted my hiss. He instantly removed his hand, falling back onto the grass because of loss of brace. I laughed weakly. He looked so silly.

"So what about your parents?" I froze. It was an innocent question. But could I lie? I liked him already enough not to lie? But what do I say? He looked up, noticing my silence. "Well… you don't have to t-tell me if you don't want to." He stuttered out nervously. "Ah no" I laughed weakly again. "It is just it is kind of a sensitive topic." I looked down.

I didn't want him to see my shame. Smooth and silky hands cupped my face. They sent a sparks across my face. My body was suddenly on fire. They lifted my head so that I stared into his emerald eyes. "Don't be nervous Bella. You can trust me." I knew I could trust him, but just how much?

"When I was 12, my mother died. She went out for ice cream for a school party that we were having, and never came back. Me and Alice are still shaken up about it." A silent tear ran down my face. His thumb wiped it away. He understood. I knew he understood. "What about your father?" he asked simply.

I knew he wasn't pressuring me to talk, but there was a weight on my shoulders when that was mentioned. Just as I was about to answer with a well-practiced lie, the bell rang for lunch. Saved by the bell. What a cliché. I laughed shakily. He stood up and offered me his hand. It was a simple gesture, but to me it meant a lot more.

I took it and he lifted me up. When I was almost up, I cried out. He had unintentionally stretched my arm. It hurt so bad. I let go and fell back onto my butt. That hurt even more. I hissed again. He crouched down, his perfect face wrinkled in worry. "Bella, are you alright?" I looked up at him. " Yes, thanks. Just clumsy me came up on my ankle wrong." I lied smoothly.

It was one of the many things I could do. He looked suspicious, but let it slide. I got up on my own and we started walking. He wrapped his hand in mine. It was a perfect fit, and I couldn't deny the sparks shooting up my arm. He was perfect. He was handsome, loyal, polite and had a future. Where did I fit in? I knew the answer. So did he. I didn't.

As we walked to the cafeteria, we got curious stares. I could already hear the gossip. "Swan? With the new guy?" "She is with him?" Ugh. I knew they had a reason to be curious, but in a bigger town, it wouldn't matter. We made it to the lunchroom without incident. But as soon as we walked in, all eyes were on us. And of course, me being me, tripped. I stumbled over air and waited to hit the floor.

Right before my face hit the white tile, cold arms wrapped around my waist. I turned. There was Edward in all of his glory, arms wrapped around me, grinning a crooked grin. I almost fainted, if I had not remembered the entire school population watching us. I

quickly sobered up. Steadily, I got to my feet. My face was red as a brick. "Thanks for catching me" I whispered quietly. He flashed another grin at me. "My pleasure." We slowly walked across the room to the table that Alice and his family was at. I could immediately see Edward's description in his family.

Emmett was flexing his muscles and picking on Alice. Jasper was sitting back coolly in his chair, with his arm around Alice's chair, and Rosalie was looking at her reflection in a mirror. I chuckled. Just another thing to add to his list. He was also smart. Emmett's voice was the one to break the silence. "So Eddie, who is your lovely clumsy friend?" I blushed.

He pointed out my trip, but also called my lovely. I didn't get that a lot. Edward frowned. Great, now he doesn't like me. "I told you not to call me Eddie, and this is Bella, Alice's sister." I blushed again. Just because of the attention. "So Alice, this fire hydrant is your sister?" How many times was I going to blush? This had to be a record. "Yes she is" Alice chirped. She got up and gave me a kiss on the cheek and a look.

I knew the look very well. It was the "_you got a lot to explain missy and I am not going to let you anywhere till you do_" look that Alice had. "Are you going to stand there all day and turn more red? Or are you going to sit down and eat?" I looked around. All eyes were still on us, and I blushed again when I realized we had been just standing there for the conversation.

I sank into a chair beside Alice. Lunch went smooth for the most part. Emmett cracking jokes about my balance or my red face. Jasper kept Alice entertained, and Rosalie never looked up from her mirror. But at the end of lunch was when things got pulled up short. Two nasal voices made it to our table. Dumb and dumber. A.k.a. Jessica and Lauren. Jessica was gossip queen with wild curly brown hair. Lauren was a blonde dumb bitch. She lived to make my life horrible at school. She led the mean jokes and the tripping in the halls. Not that I needed it.

They walked over to our table. It suddenly smelled of sweet perfume and bubble gum. I wonder why. When they reached our table, they felt the need to sling their arms all over Edward, who was sitting defenseless in his chair. His face was horrified. "Eddie! What a surprise to see you here! How was your first day so far?" they screamed in his ear, bending down so that Edward had a view of their implanted chests. He looked away, trying to divert his eyes.

"It was fine thank you." He muttered tactfully. I stifled a giggle, but unfortunately my efforts didn't go unnoticed. Lauren looked up from almost suffocating Edward with her breath. "Swan, what a pleasure seeing you here." Her voice dripped with venom. Uh huh wow. You come to my table, and don't expect to see me here. Yeah right.

"What a pleasure as well Mallory. How fitting it must be to see me at my table. How about that…." I said in a mocking voice. Edward's family and Alice only noticed. They were holding in laughter. Emmett was shaking the table he was trying to hard. "Well good for you Swan. So Eddie.." she tried to purr. It sounded like a strangled cat.

"How about you go sit where I am? You know, instead of with these _losers_." I scoffed at the word loser. Like we were the losers? She sat with Jessica full of guys and no girls except for them. Can you say desperate? And we were the losers? "Um actually Lauren, I would rather sit here with my _family_. So if you could get your hands off of me that would be great." He stressed the word family. I was proud. Most guys would jump at the chance.

She released his neck from a choke-hold and pushed her bloated chest off of his. "Well then maybe next period we could find a closet or something." Subtle much? "You know, just skip it. Like you did with Swan?" Anger flared in me. What did she know?

"Excuse you Mallory. But I believe you have no input in that what so ever. You don't know what we did, and we are not going to tell you. But I can give you a hint. It was something you don't know how to do, and wasn't a slut act like yours." It got quiet.

Great… everyone had just witnessed me tell of Fork's High school queen bee. This was going to go down sooooo well. My table stared back at me, shocked. Alice's mouth was gaping open. She had never heard me say anything like that to anyone. And finally after the silence, two things interrupted it.

Emmett's booming laugh and Lauren's high-pitched screech. "You bitch! You have no right to speak to me that way! How dare you!" She made a move to slap me, but a pale hand held her back. A quiet, calm, but deadly voice spoke. "Lauren, I suggest you and your friend leave this table. Don't talk, just go. And if you call Bella that again, we will have a large problem." Lauren looked down, shocked.

The guy she was shamelessly hitting on just told her to go away. I couldn't help it. I laughed out loud. That had never happened to her before. Her face was priceless! She gave me a death look, grabbed Jessica by the arm, which had been flirting with no success with Jasper, and walked away.

Then I heard it. Clapping. Emmett had started clapping, which lead the entire cafeteria to start. My face turned crimson. Everyone was clapping for the nobody and the new kid that just rejected the queen bee. I sank down in my chair and covered my face in embarrassment. They eventually stopped, but not with out shooting us glances every minute. Great… more gossip. Just what I need.

I finally opened my eyes. Everyone at the table was still staring at me. Even Rosalie, who had an amused expression on her face. Emmett leaned across the table and high-fived me. I grinned. I had made some new awesome friends. Suddenly the warning bell rang, breaking everyone from his or her trance. We gathered our stuff and headed out the door. Alice came up to my side.

"So what did you do?" she asked with a wink. "We went for a walk and talked." That was all I was going to give. She knew there was more, but decided to pass**. **Then realization hit her face. It dropped into horror. "Alice, Alice. What is wrong?" She looked up with the same look. She uttered the word that reality dropping down on me again. "Charlie." My heart stopped. I forgot about him.

What would happen when he got the call from the school? I froze. What about Edward? Would he know about him? I couldn't endanger him like that. I held back the tears that threatened to overflow. I knew what I had to do. Tonight, I had to take the blame, lie and say I wanted to skip. Then never see him again. For his sake. I couldn't care less what happened to me. Charlie already hurt me. But if he hurt Edward, I would never forgive myself. Neither would he. But then I looked up at his perfect face.

Could I really do it?

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**Okay yall so that was 4746 words thank you very much.**

**So the cafeteria thing actually happened to me. Unfortunately. the drugs come in at the next chapter. So will she? Or will she not? Keep reading and you will find out. Thank you for whoever reviewed in the last chapter!!**

**Here is the song!**

**_Did it happen when we first kissed  
Cause it's hurting me to let it go  
Maybe cause we spent so much time  
And I know that it's no more  
I should've never let you hold me baby  
Maybe why i'm sad to see us apart  
I didn't give to you on purpose  
Gotta figure out how you stole my heart_**

**Either PM or review me the title and you get the next chapter dedicated to you!**

**So see you in hopefully 3 days! Read and Review!**

**-Avery**


	3. Chapter 2

**Hola people. Thank you for the people who reviewed last chapter. It wasn't much, but the optimistic side of me says it was. This chapter is dedicated to…UrEveryDayDork!!**

**Thank you very much! I listened to the song Cry by Rihanna the entire time I was writing that chapter!**

**Onward!**

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I continued to walk to biology in a daze. My mind was going over the possibilities of pain he would give me. My only chance was to get home before they called, but it would be hard. I sighed as I open the heavy classroom door. I looked around. I was the first one there. No surprise there. I thought back to Edward's schedule. I was pretty sure he had this class with me, but the memory was hazy.

Just as that thought passed my mind. The god himself opened the door. Speak of the angel… he looked around and his eyes rested on me. A crooked grin lit up his face. Blood filled mine. He was happy to see me? He strode through the classroom gracefully. My heart dropped. He was perfect. There was no way…. I swallowed my negativity and put a smile on my face. "Are you alright?" his concerned eyes swept my face. I recoiled. My defense was down at the moment. "Yeah, but kind of tired. By the way, thank you for saving my ass in the cafeteria." I laughed nervously. "Oh that's no problem." He snorted. Only him could make that sound sexy.

"I was looking for a way to gather out of there anyway." I looked away. Hopefully he wouldn't see the desperation in my face. After a while the room filled. Lauren and Jessica walked in last. As soon as they saw me sitting by Edward, the death glares started. _Great, It was going to be another one of those days_. Mr. Banner walked in wheeling a television on the stand. A small boring speech later and we were watching a movie on cells.

My mind tried to stay on the movie, but it couldn't. It was stuck on the perfect specimen of a human being that was sitting next to me. When Mr. Banner turned off the lights, my senses went crazy. Every breath that Edward took, my eyes watched the rise and fall of his chest. His sweet smell my nose picked up. His subtle fidgets were amplified though my ears. And my touch. Oh my touch… my hands were glued to the table. I couldn't help myself. Just sitting next to him gave me the familiar sparks running up and down my arms. They were like firecrackers under my skin.

I let out a held breath when Mr. Banner turned on the lights. That was the longest hour of my life. The need to touch him overwhelmed me. As soon as the bell rang, I limped out of there as fast as I could. Who knows what he was thinking? He probably didn't want to see me again. I made my way to gym and into the locker room. I slammed the door and collapsed against the wall. This was so hard. I don't know how long I could keep this up. But I had to protect him…

The rest of school passed like a daze, and before I knew it I was in my truck. Alice said she would catch I ride home with Jasper. I smiled at the thought of my sister. She had finally found one. There was no doubting the way they looked at each other. I was so distracted; I didn't notice the idle police cruiser in the middle of the driveway. I froze getting out of the cab.

What the hell was he dong home early? Did he get a call from the school? My spirits dropped. I approached the house like it was a ticking bomb. The old wood door creaked as I opened it. My soft footsteps echoed down the empty halls. I admit it. I was scared to death. Only when I entered the living room did I see another presence.

Charlie was sitting in the chair, staring at the ground. His expression was blank, but it didn't fool me. I could see the fury in his dark eyes. "So Isabella, how was your day?" he spat my name like it was a curse. "It was fine dad. Thank you for asking." I refused to meet his eyes. I knew what they held. "So what did you do at school today?" he asked pleasantly. But I could hear the monster in him waiting to be unleashed. "It was nice. There are new students here. Alice and I showed them around. They are polite." I said trying to keep up with the charade.

"Oh really… so where were you in the middle of the day?" I knew the best was to not lie, so I tried to keep it simple. "Well, I skipped the few periods before lunch..." I cringed, waiting for the explosion. After nothing, I peeked under my eyelids. His face was still expressionless. "So the fact that you were seen skipping with Edward Cullen escaped your mind?" he asked with no emotion. He knew the answer; he was just waiting for me to admit it. "I skipped with him yes sir." That was the straw on the camel's back.

"What?! I raise you for 17 years, day and night, and this is how you repay me! By going off and fucking the first guy that comes along?! You slut! You whore! How was he? Was he worth it? I have had it up to here with you! All I ask is food on the table, and I get this bitch!" His hand came down hard on my face. It didn't hurt. The first act never hurt. His fist came at me next, hitting me in the gut. I crumpled. The pain was terrible, but the worst was yet to come. His boot collided with my ribs. I felt a sharp crack. I screamed out. It hurt to breathe. The pain was so intense. I felt my self-losing consciousness. My vision was becoming dizzy. All I saw was a red face, and hatred shining in black orbs. I fell into a pool of blackness, and didn't want to resurface.

"Bella! Bella! Please wake up!" a high pitched voice was calling me. I didn't want to come. I was in peace. I felt a sharp pain in my side. Something was stabbing in my ribs. I winced. I think I broke a rib. As my senses became clearer, so did my pain. Excruciating pain surrounded me. Pressing at every inch of my body. I cried out, suddenly opening my eyes.

It hurt! Tears were coming out of my eyes, through my wet vision, I saw a small figure in front of me, trying to sit me down. I complied. I didn't want anymore trouble. A small shriek set my vision into focus. There, was Alice, standing with red-rimmed eyes, and a first aid kit. My eyes watered without the pain. She was my savior. Her arm daintily reached out to me, finally realizing my pain. She was trying to help me, and what was I doing? I was pushing her away.

I smiled weakly. "Are you okay Alice?" she looked at me in disbelief. "You are the one bleeding on your sheets, and you are asking if I am okay?" She shook her head. What? I was just trying to look out for her? What was wrong with that? "Let me patch you up Bella." Those words snapped me into reality. I looked around. I saw familiar blue curtains, a wooden desk, and my white sheets that were now red from my bed.

"Wait, how did I get here? The last thing I remember was…" I trailed off. The last thing I remembered was Charlie's boot colliding with my stomach. I winced as I remembered the pain. "Um, I dragged you up here. When I got home, Charlie was gone. I am so sorry! I should not have left you alone with him! I can't believe I didn't ride home with you! I am so sorry!" I finally looked at Alice. She had tears coming out of here eyes. Her happy eyes were now filled with sorrow and pain. I couldn't stand it. She shouldn't look like that. "No Alice. Don't be sorry. It would have happened with or without you. I am just glad you were not here so you didn't have to see it" I said with all the strength I could muster.

I couldn't have her look at all of my scars. It would hurt her more than now. "I can patch myself up. Just hand me the first aid kit please." She shook her head. I knew it was going to be hard. But it was my choice. "Alice. Please give me the kit. I have done this before, but this time shouldn't matter. Now please hand me the kit." I barely got the words out. She shook her head again. I didn't want to deal with this. I just wanted to sleep. "Alice, please." I whimpered.

I knew it was a low blow, but it was for her own good. Her eyes filled with fresh tears, and she ran out of my room. My heart ached. I hated dong that to her, but… she didn't need my pain. I slowly hoisted myself off the bed. My arms screamed in protest, but I ignored them. I needed to do this.

I slowly hobbled over to my mirror. I cringed from what I saw. My face was crusty with dried blood around my hairline. There were tear tracks through the dirt and grime going down my face. My eyes were red, with deep pain pounded in them. There were deep purple bruises around my jaw and nose. I looked like a punching bag, and that was just my face. Closing my eyes, I lifted my shirt. I bit my lip to hold in the cry that threatened to come. I opened my eyes and almost retched at what I saw. My chest was filled blue and violet spots as big as a shoe. almost dried blood covered my stomach and chest. There was a cut below my rib, and black spots around the bottom of my stomach. I couldn't take off my pants. The pain from my ribs was so bad.

I grabbed the alcohol pads in the first-aid kit, and got to work. They stung like no other, but I cleaned the cuts on my face and chest. The smell from the alcohol kept my head clean from the dizziness that blood gave me, but it also made me acute of all my senses. I knew what I had to do. I knew what I had to do to reach my only escape. As quick as I could, I wrapped and bandaged my wounds, and searched for the box at the top of my closet. It hurt, but I ignored it. I knew it would pay off deeply.

I smiled in triumph when my hand felt the scratchy surface of a shoebox. I brought it down and onto my bed. There lied a razor, a bag with white powder, and pen tube. There lied my safe haven from the world. My face broke into a smile as I cut up the small rocks. My body itched in anticipation as I lined up the fine substance. My nose burned as the powder went up. My mind numbed as it fell into a world I understood. A world of peace and freedom.

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**Hello again people. I would like to say I hit my deadline... my computer just didnt want to load the document. So I hope you enjoyed it. The beating was true. Yes it hurt. It is a shorter chapter today of only 2,167 words because you didn't need all of the blood and gore. i gave you plenty. Please continue to read an review! It makes my day.**

**As for _All It Took Was Him_, I am sad to say that there are several reasons that I didn't continue it. One, all of my chapters were destoyed in the Dickinson computer crash of the year. Two, I accidently deleted the story when I went to edit it. Therefore, I decided that fate was trying to tell me something. I am deeply sorry to those that were reading it.**

**Your song!**

**_Go ahead and buy yourself a drink  
Cause you know you're deserving of it  
Go ahead and cry yourself to sleep  
And think how you hate me so bad._**

**There is is ladies and gents! I also have a poll up on my profile! (Thanx to UrEveryDayDork) Please vote! R & R!**

**-Avery**


	4. Chapter 3

**I am grateful of the response I got for the last chapter. I am surprised. No one got the last song. **

**It was _Believe Me, I Am Lying by Forever the Sickest. _**

**It's a good song. Anyway, I still dedicate this chapter to two people. UrEveryDayDork. She has motivated me and supported me since the very beginning, and dvorndran. She leaves awesome and long reviews. I love you both!! In a non-creepy way!**

**This next chapter is slightly happier. Just wait and read!**

**Onward!……**

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I felt like shit. That was the cleanest I could put it. My head ached and my body was sore. It hurt to move, but there was nothing new there. I tried to sit up in my bed, and hunched back over. My ribs were stinging in pain. The release I had from the coke was gone, and now only the after affects showed their ugly head.

I sat up again, and fought through the pain. I knew I had to get up. I had to go to school and act normal for everyone else. It sounded so easy, but why was it so hard? Then I thought of Edward. Edward my angel. Seeing him in my mind and his crooked smile with the greenest eyes sent shivers down my spine that had nothing to do with the drugs. Swinging my legs over the side of the bed, I wobbled to my feet and almost collapsed again. The pain was almost unbearable.

My hand went out to steady myself and I hissed when my arm locked, tightening my shoulders. Wincing and grimacing, I made my way down the stairs, holding onto the rail for dear life. With each step, pain shot up my spine and breathing became a chore. I got to the medicine cabinet and held a breath as I reached up. As quick as I could, I gathered all the pain medicine in my hand, and brought them down. I knew enough about what I could take with what, but I wished I didn't. I wished I could take them all, but I knew better than that.

On my way back up the stairs, I noticed something that I had not before. There were streaks on the walls. I slowly bent down to check them out. _This was where_- I stopped myself from going any further. This was where_ last night_ happened. …_and I bled… someone wiped it off… oh my god._ My heart sank and bile rose in my throat. Charlie would never do something he considered "women's work." That meant that_…Alice did it_.

I felt sick to my empty stomach. Charlie made Alice wipe up my blood. Horror and guilt washed over me. My stomach retched at the picture of her. Ankle deep in my blood. Trying to get away. I ran up the stairs as fast as I could, ignoring the pain and soreness. I barely made it to the bathroom before my stomach contents made themselves known. There I stood, over the toilet over my own sister's horror.

My stomach retched again as I saw Charlie ordering her to do it, her ankle deep, trying to get out. Numb, I made my way back to my room. I looked at the alarm clock. It was 7:43. School started in 45 minutes. Without feeling, I got dressed, being careful of my wounds, and ate. My breakfast consisted of a granola bar. I knew I might not be able to keep it down, but I might as well try. Slowly, I made my way out to the truck.

The drive to school seemed longer than usual, but I was glad. It gave me more time to prepare my stories. I fell down the stairs after tripping over my shoes. It sounded good enough to me, no one would doubt it, and Charlie would probably approve. I came up on the school and my heart sunk. Alice was standing with Jasper looking horrible. Her usual perky eyes were flay and dead. As if filled with horrible memories. Which they had. Was this how I looked? When she saw my truck, or rather heard it, she shuddered slightly. Not enough for Jasper to notice, but enough for me.

She probably hated me now. I bit back the sob that rose in my throat. I had to stay strong. I could not show anybody my weakness.

As soon as I parked my truck. I hopped out. I was late because of earlier. Quick as I could, I made my way to first period. I had not seen Edward yet, but that was all for the best. When I walked in. I blushed. Everyone was staring at me, and the teacher was giving me a very dirty glare. I had obviously interrupted her boring speech. "Ms.Swan, care to explain why you are late?" Her ice-cold voice made me shiver. It was like nails on a chalkboard.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Alice shudder again and look away. She knew why. She always knew why. " I- I am sorry Ms.Hayes… I- I didn't wake up on time." I gave my shaky excuse. I guess she believed it. But before she turned away from the blackboard. A nasal, nauseating voice rang out in the classroom.

"Of course she did Ms.Hayes. Everyone knows that Bella has such the busy nightlife. After all, what does she do? Go directly home and never come out?" she asked looking around the class. She was trying to get a reaction out of me. If a reaction was what she wanted, than a reaction was what she was going to get. "Oh I am sorry Mallory. But I do have a life. I just don't spend it fucking every last guy on campus. Excuse me if I don't wake up to a new guy in my bed every night. Was it you that was buying the 100 pack of condoms at the drugstore? Because it looked like you. I bet you go through those fast don't cha?" It went quiet.

I don't know what happened. I guess I snapped. Anger fueled my entire speech. Lauren looked up at me. Her face was shocked and humiliated. Good. Now she got a taste of her own medicine. I laughed and went to go sit down when I angry ice cold voice sliced through the air. "Swan! Mallory! Principal's office now!" I cursed in my head. Of course I forgot. "Bu- but! Why should I go? She started it." Lauren whined. I laughed.

"Uh huh. So shouting out in the classroom mocking my personal life was not starting it. Bull shit. C'mon whore. I got to go before you start saying your fateful good-byes." I strode over to the door, wincing as it stretched my arm. When my foot crossed the threshold, a thundering applause echoed from the class. I looked back, my face bright red.

Alice and the gang were the loudest, with Emmett beating on his chest. I laughed, wincing at the pain in my ribs. And then my eyes landed on Edward. He was trying to avoid Lauren's lusty gaze, and was smiling like he won the lottery. He turned his head and caught my glance. His face lit up even more, if that was even possible, and he gave me a crooked grin. I almost melted.

But a sharp hit in my left side knocked me breathless onto the floor. Crying out from the pain, I held onto my side for dear life. She had knocked one of the bruises and bones in her violence demeanor. Alice saw my face and ran from the back of the room. Knocking Lauren's shoulder, she bent down next to me. Whispering to where I could only hear, she said, "It is broken isn't it?" I shook my head. "They." I corrected. Her eyes widened in horror. "Plus a cut." I croaked out weakly. I lifted my shirt barely so that she could see the large gash in my side that was covered by white gauze and tape.

Her eyes widened even more, and eyes filled with pity and tears. "Um- Ms Hayes, would it be alright if I escorted Bella to the office. I am sure someone else should take Lauren as well. Just so that a fight doesn't break out in the halls." She added weakly with a small chuckle. Ms. Hayes looked at her pensively. "Okay, um-… Mr.Cullen, could you escort Lauren to the principal?"

I almost laughed out oud. Edward's face dropped into disgust and denial. "Sure Ms.Hayes." He added convincingly. I almost gagged when I saw Lauren batting her eyelashes at him. I felt sorry for the poor guy. He caught my gaze and smiled again. How could he smile in his position? I felt Alice sharply jerk at my arm. I looked down at her and almost flinched back.

Her small hazel eyes only held anger and warning. We started to walk after Edward left with Lauren. As soon as we were out of eyesight from the classroom, she pulled me into a bathroom. Sharply jerking on my arm. "I demand to tell me why you were late and take off your shirt!" she whispered yelled. I was taken back. Why would she want to see that? It was repulsive. "No." I shook my head. I was dong her a favor by doing that.

"I swear to the good lord Isabella Marie Swan! If you don't tell me, than I will tell the entire school what happens at home and I will rip this shirt off of you! Forcefully!" she added. I gasped in horror. Surely she wouldn't she couldn't. Not if she didn't want to be killed by Charlie. "Alice, I don't want you to see them. They look horrible. And why do you want to know?" I couldn't believe it. I thought she hated me. "I want to know because I care about you. And if you don't let me see them, how can I know to help you?" I looked her straight in the eye; she was pleading to me.

How could I resist? " Fine." I answered. "I was late because I did wake up late, and didn't have time to dress everything properly. And… it hurt to move around." I looked away at the last statement. I couldn't bear to look at her face. "How did you fall asleep so quickly? You know that is dangerous. What if you had an concussion?" I stiffened. This was the only part of my life that Alice didn't know about. The one part I kept secret, but one of my biggest influences. "I- I took a bunch of pain meds. I guessed they knocked me out." I stuttered. Way to blow my cover!

She sighed, but bought it. In my mind I jumped for joy. In the world I was crippled and sitting on a toilet seat. "Okay fine. Now let me see you." She reached for the hem of my shirt. I involuntarily flinched back. She huffed and pinned my arms against the wall as she lifted. I looked away again. Her face would have broken the heart of the most ugliest of old men. "Oh my god Bella!" she covered her mouth and sobbed against the door.

That bad huh? I looked down. I saw the extra cause. The rib was sticking out of my stomach from when Lauren pushed me, and the white gauze was now blood red and dripping from the broken skin. Even I retched. I limped over to the sink, and opened my bag, that had extra supplies in it. And there, in front of Alice, I took the bandage off. She looked again, and broke down even more. I barely noticed. At the moment I was numb.

After cleaning it, and applying fresh wrapping, I put my shirt back on, and knelt down to where she was. I limply wrapped her in a hug, trying not to press my body against her. "I am so sorry Alice. I can't imagine having to clean up the mess by the stairs. That must have been horrible for you." As I spoke, fresh tears dripped down my face and into her hair.

She looked up incredulous. "You are the one with broken limbs and bleeding out the wha-zoo, and you are sorry for me for having to clean up a couple streaks of blood. Bella…" she trailed off. I shook my head, wincing again. She noticed, and broke down into more tears. But I felt even worse. And the reason I felt worse, was even in this scenario, the only thing I could think about was the cocaine in my closet.

After calming Alice down, we started out the restroom. But as we turned the corner, I swore I saw a flash of bronze across the hall. I shook it off, laughing at myself for making up such a thing. We slowly made our way to the principal's office. When we got there, Lauren was sitting in a plastic blue chair, reapplying her make-up. As if that would help her get out of this.

Alice sat me down in a chair, and whispered encouraging words in my ear before she left. As soon as the door closed, an awkward silence filled the air. We were both stubborn enough not to apologize, so when the squeak of the principal door came, we jumped. "Mallory! Swan!" a sharp voice, yelled. I laughed. This was so familiar. Lauren trudged while I almost skipped. As we walked in, the smell of old cologne and mints filled the air. I sniffed. It wasn't that bad.

There stood an old, balding man in his late 40s. He sat behind a maple desk with a cheap plastic nametag that said "Principal". Yeah. So original. He gestured to the straight-backed wooden chairs in separate corners and we sat without a word. "So do either of you young ladies want to explain to me why I have a note written from Ms.Hayes about you both yelling and screaming curses in the middle of class?" I nodded my head. Might as well get a word in before the whore made excuses.

"I came in late to first period, and when I was going to sit down, Lauren makes a rather rude and comment on my social life, and I proceeded to retort, and I lost control of myself. I am sorry sir. It will not happen again." I sat back quickly. Now to let her emotional and dramatic performance begin in _5…4…3…2…1…_ "_Mr…Whatever-Your-Name-Is_...She started it! I was minding my own business when she comes bursting through the door in last year's shoes! All I did was try to give her a _suggestion_ on another pair, and she starts blowing up and cursing at me!"

Oh great. She is pulling fake tears. "And-… and I am so hurt! I am sorry Bella! I didn't mean to hurt your feelings! But why did you have to do that! You know I am sensitive!" she wailed. I rolled my eyes. "Excuse me sir if I may interrupt. But that was not what she said. And if she was so sensitive, then why when we were leaving, push me and knock me down to the floor?" The old man looked up at me, shocked.

"Well then I guess it is a good thing that I called both of your parents. They are sitting outside as we speak. You both have a 3-day suspension. I hope you use that time to repent, and think over your actions. You are dismissed." I blindly got up and quickly went out the door.

His words didn't settle with me until I walked out the door, and saw a purple Charlie in his police uniform sitting in a too small chair, like a lion waiting to pounce. I froze.

Oh shit.

What have I done?

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**Sorry yall for the longer wait. I am trying my hardest! Anyway...**

**The classroom scene actally did happen. Yes i cussed out my ememy infront of everybody, and got applauded for it! So anyway, i love you reviews so please keep them coming! Here is your song!**

**_And then I crashed into you,  
And I went up in flames.  
Could've been the death of me,  
But then you breathed your breath in me.  
And I crashed into you,  
Like a runaway train.  
You will consume me,  
But I can't walk away._**

**There is your song! I tpypically use the ones that I listen to while writing. So again, if you get the song right, the chapter is dedicated to you!**

**R&R!**

**-Avery**


	5. Chapter 4

**Hey sorry peeps about the last cliffy. I know it was pretty harsh, but I hope that this clears it up. A couple of people had questions. I am not one to spoil the story. But I will tell you this. This next chapter contains high extreme adult content. You will have to wait and read.**

**Anyway, with the dedications…. briiittx xhc, KrisCullen, and Hse Hissie.**

**They guessed right! The song was Crashed by Chris Daughtry!**

**Anyway… Onward!…**

* * *

We walked in silence out to the parking lot. I knew I was in for it. Never had he had to come up to the school, and never had I seen him this color. Every 5 seconds, his ugly wrinkly face would send me death glares that shot through my spine. _If looks could kill…_

I almost gasped. Why was I joking about this? Never had I been so calm, and I knew that it could only cause trouble. We reached the cruiser and he threw open his door, almost sending it off the hinges and threw himself in. Calmly as possible, I opened my door and crept in. The fury he had seemed to rise like smoke in the car.

At an unbelievably fast speed, he drove home. I leaned back in my seat slightly. I would have to block this all out. We pulled up to the house and my breath caught. Without making a remark to me, he slammed his door and stomped up to the house. I mentally took a sigh of relief. Maybe he wasn't going to hurt me tonight.

Slowly, I got out of the car and made it up the walk. As soon as I stepped in the door, two hands grabbed my neck and pulled down. Charlie shut the door behind me, and threw me on the couch. "How dare you fight you worthless bitch! What did she do? Did she trip you on the way to class? Huh? What makes you think you are better than she is? Calling her a whore? You are no better yourself!" his eyes burned with accusation and hate.

I looked away and tried to zone out. I couldn't stand it. But his words cut like a knife. I knew I wasn't better. I knew I was just some girl off the side of the street. But hearing my alleged father say it was putting the words in front of me in reality.

"What about Edward?" he spit his name like a curse. "How many times have you fucked him this week? I told you that you were just a no good whore. Are you any good? That way I know when I try you out myself. Huh? Are you? Does he scream and moan your name?" My eyes were closed and tears were streaming down my face.

How could he say this? He was my father for god sakes. I mentally corrected myself. He wasn't my father. He was vile monster. I opened my eyes to see Charlie's mouth still moving, but the only thing I could think of was how Edward was doing. It was about lunchtime he would be sitting at our table with Alice and his siblings.

Then my mind drifted to Alice. More tears ran down my face as I remembered her face in the restroom. It was heartbreaking. And I had caused it. I couldn't cause her more pain. But what could I do? If I stayed here, it would. She would still be mopping up my blood and seeing the damn scars that Charlie leaves on me. I would have to leave. That was my only choice.

But what about travel? Where would I go? I had no other place to be. My thoughts were knocked out of my head when I felt something sharp move across my face.

I focused my eyes. There stood Charlie with his knife in hand with a murderous expression. I gasped. The pain finally hit. I lifted my hand to my cheek. Blood was streaming down and I could taste it. It was then that another slicing went down my arm. I cried out, not being able to hold it in. it only seemed to encourage him. I whimpered as I saw his hand come down again.

It stopped right above my thigh, as if testing me. I mustered the courage I had, and I looked up. Charlie was staring at me, as if daring me to move. "Please don't." I whispered. I sounded pathetic. Here I was, pleading my father not to cut me. Who else had done it?

At my words, his hairy arm came down, and slid into my skin like butter. I cried out and leaned froward, shrieking at the pain. Satisfied, he pulled the bloody knife out and left the room with another slap to the face and several curses. Crying and holding my leg to try and stop the bleeding, I knelt to the floor, screaming. The last thing I saw was the ceiling fan, going around and around, and then I faded into everlasting darkness.

_I was standing over a cliff. It was cool and windy with grey threatening skies. The ledge was skinny, barely one of my feet fit on it. I was overlooking the ocean. The water was crashing down against the sharp rocks and flowing out to sea. I felt high. Not on drugs, but height. I looked down and almost choked. I was at least 100 ft above water, with the rocks below me, daring me to jump and fall into their dangerous clutches. A loud grunt of effort from below directed my attention. About 50 ft down, Charlie was climbing the rocks and coming after me._

_Then I realized that I should be the one screaming. It was only me and the monster on this dangerous cliff. I backed away, not wanting to go over, but then I thought. What could be so bad? A couple scratches, some bruises, but I would be away from the man that ruined my life. I looked down again, thinking. With each second, he got closer and my heart dropped. _

_Then I heard _**him**_. "Bella!" a velvet voice called up from beside me. I smiled. Edward and Alice were calling out to me from the forest. I laughed. Why were they here? It was just supposed to be the monster and me. "Bella don't jump! Please don't go away!" I smiled. That was Alice. _

_Of course her optimistic self wouldn't see my side. I was getting away from my problems without hurting everyone else. It was a win/win. Right when I was about to tip over, I heard the one thing that made me stop. "Bella! I love you! Please don't go!" I froze. It didn't come from Alice. It came from Edward. _

_I looked back at them his face was sad with grief mixed in. he had a pleading expression. My resolve weakened immensely. I looked down. No nothing could stop me. I leaped over the edge, enjoying the soaring feeling. A scream as I went down filled my ears and I smiled. They didn't understand. They never would. When my body hit the icy cold water, I jolted up._

I looked around. It was only a dream. Only a dream. But a small part in me wished different. The soaring freedom and knowing a highway out of this life seemed too good to be true. When I leaned over the bed, the pain hit me. I doubled over. Gasping for breath, I sat back again. Then I remembered what happened. And looked around, finally realizing my whereabouts. I was in my room again. Someone had taken me up here again after I had passed out.

I reached up and touched my cheek. It was rough. It had gauze taped over it. I gasped. Alice. She must have helped me again. I immediately felt guilty. I did it to her again. I was disgusted with myself. Curious, I lifted the blanket and gasped again. My leg was covered neatly in white gauze and tape. My arm was the same. Tears welled in my eyes. She was too good to me. Alice was my savior.

Getting out of bed was hard, but I did it, with wincing every now and then when I stepped the wrong way. Slowly, I made my way to the shower. I stripped down, grimacing at every wrong move. I knew I couldn't get my bandages wet, so I covered them in saran, and jumped in.

After relaxing for about a minute, I got down to business. Even though my injuries were bandaged neatly, dried blood and bruises still covered my body. Lightly as I could, I scrubbed off the blood and winced when I hit each tender spot. After a while, my muscles started to relax, and I got out.

It was freezing. Quickly, I stripped the saran, and wrapped myself in a towel. Then I gasped in horror. I had not brought clothes in my haste. I mentally chastised myself. I opened the door slowly so it didn't make noise, and crept out. Wincing with every step, I made it to my door. Just as I was about to open it, Charlie made his way loudly up the stairs.

As quick as I could, I opened and shut the door, but it wasn't quick enough. "Isabella. You will let Edward see your body but not me? I am disappointed! What about me?" My door banged open. An angry Charlie burst in. "So you would not let me see? How is that fair? I thought you were a slut. I guess I was wrong. But it still doesn't matter. I have not had any fun since Renée died and whose fault is that? Oh yeah yours. So now it is time to pay me back." I froze.

This was the one thing I was most afraid of. I couldn't let him take this from me. This was the one thing I had left. This was the reason why I was barely innocent. I had been beaten, cut, drugged up, drunk. I had lied. I had stolen. This was the one thing that I held on to. And no one was going to take this from me. At the sudden burst of confidence, I yelled.

I was going to bite, fight, yell, and what ever I had to do stop this. "No Charlie. You are not going to do this! You are not going to rape your daughter!" I tried. I thought it might come to him what he was going to do, but it didn't it made it worse. Much worse. "You think you are my daughter?" Hate sparkled in his black eyes. "You stopped being my daughter when you took Renée away from me. That was it. Now you are nothing more than a murderer. You are nothing more than worthless scum that I peel off my feet. The dirt that washes away. That is what you are. So get used to it. And one more thing. It is not rape. You are going to enjoy every bit of it."

With that, he reached for my towel. I stepped back and bit his hand. His skin broke under my teeth and he howled in pain. His good hand came forward and slapped my face, making me cry in pain when he hit the cut. I slumped to the ground, as blood poured out of my reopened wound. He took that advantage and pulled down my towel. My horrible body was now exposed to him, and his pants twitched. "Oh look at Isabella's poor pittlful scars. Too bad I dont care. I was the one that made them. And damn proud of it." I jumped to the corner of the room, trying to find something to cover myself with.

I grabbed my sheet and held it close. Charlie charged forward, and I screamed. I screamed like no other. But it didn't do anything. The nearest neighbors were miles away, and Alice wasn't due home for 30 minutes. My heart sank. There was no one to save me.

When Charlie reached me, he slapped me again and put his hand over my mouth. I tried to bite it, but it was too far. So I settled for kicking him. I couldn't kick hard. When I lifted my leg, the gash had my crying again in pain. I fell, unable to support myself.

Charlie lifted me up and threw me on my bed. I screamed when my head made contact with the headboard. My cheek had hit the side, and an old bruise had been hit. I tried to get up, but my leg collapsed under me. Charlie jumped on my little twin bed, and ripped off his shirt. I retched.

His nasty hand trailed up my arms, and pulled the sheet down. I tried to block it out. I tried to store it in the back of my mind, but it didn't work. I could feel his hands traveling down my neck and on my breasts. His breath hot and sticky on my neck and he licked my ear. His rancid smell of beer and cigarettes. I tried to move, to kick, to scream, but nothing would cooperate.

He held down my limbs with his legs. His greedy hands grabbed at my breasts, and squeezed them hard. I cried out in pain. This couldn't be happening. Not now. Not yet. Not by him. His hands traveled further south as his lips took their place. His sticky tongue left a trail of slime down my neck and in my chest cavity.

I squirmed trying to get away, he wouldn't let me. I prayed for anything. A meteor, fire, just something. My prayer was not answered. He removed his hand from my mouth to unbuckle his pants. I looked away and stared at the ceiling. I felt his hardness against me. I almost threw up.

He rubbed against me and made a sickening moan. He moved his hands back and started touching me again. Tears ran down my cheeks when I realized this was it. This was what was going to happen and I couldn't stop it. Squeezing my eyes shut, I waited.

I waited for the inevitable pain and the mark of my last bit of innocence to be gone. I waited. And I waited. But then I heard the most glorious sound of all. It was the sound I owed my life to. Charlie's work phone was ringing in his jean pocket that was on the floor. He uttered a loud curse, and moved off of me. I sighed in relief. It wasn't going to happen now. Not today.

More tears ran down my cheeks, but it wasn't from the pain. It was in relief and happiness. "Yes, uh huh. No I am not busy." He took a look at me, and lust filled his eyes. I resisted the urge to vomit again. "Yes sir, I can make it there. Uh huh. Yeah I will be there in 10." He slammed the phone against the bedside table and looked at me again with the same disgusting expression. I reached for the sheets, but his hand stopped me. "You and I will finish this later. I swear to god if you move, you will die." The fury in his eyes told me he wasn't bluffing, so I nodded, wincing at the pain.

"Good. I will be back in 3 hours. Clean yourself up and be in my bedroom hen I get back." He left without a backward glance. After the shock of what just happened hit me, I started to sob. When had my life taken this turn? Why me? But then I answered myself. I knew why. It was just karma's way of getting back at me for my mother. It was just biting me in the ass that I wanted ice cream and not cookies.

And there I sat. I cried for me, I cried for Charlie, Alice, Renée, and Edward. How was I going to make it through these three days? Would I come out alive? I was so distracted, I don't notice myself lying down. But when I felt the hot sheets on my back, reality hit me. Or at least the pain did. My ribs throbbed, and my arm and leg was cut open again.

I lifted the sheet, and became dizzy. I thought I had gotten used to the blood, but seeing this amount was too much. Slowly I lost consciousness. But before I completely slipped under, I heard a small voice calling my name. It was distant, it was quiet, but it was there. I tried to reach out to it, but the darkness carried me under.

**

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**

Hello. Are you wiping tears out of your eyes? I know I am. I am sorry for that part, but it had to be there for the story to run it's course. No, nothing except what you read in the story happened with us. Every time there would be a distraction.. Here I stand, a virgin and damn proud of it.

So I got that chapter out quicker than usual to make up for the cliify. It was a whole whopping 3,022 words! Has anyone noticed that most of my chapters end with a cliffy or her getting into trouble? I have.

**Anyway... your song!**

_**Do you feel like a man when you push her around?  
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?  
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end  
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.  
Face down in the dirt, she said,  
"This doesn't hurt", she said,  
"I finally had enough."**  
_

**Thank you for reading, now just review! It makes perfect sense! Just ask the FanFiction Fairy!**

**-Avery**


	6. Chapter 5

**So how are yall**

**So how are yall? I am not so good, but yall's reviews have made it better. An outstanding amount of people got the song right this time and they are.. **

**_UrEveryDayDork,… ibetagainstalice,… Hse Hissie,… PattinsonGirl513,… KrisCullen,… briiittx xhc!_ **

**It was _Face Down by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus_**

**Thank you very much people!!**

**Anyway…onward…!!**

* * *

_Beep…beep…beep_.

Ugh. Where was the awful beeping noise coming from? I tried to lift my hand, but there was something holding it down. Where was I? My eyelids felt like they had a 2-ton weight on them. And then I heard them. Voices. They were distant, almost as if in another room, but they were there. And that was when my body took a shock into reality.

I couldn't feel anything. Almost literally. I could wiggle my toes, I could move my left hand, but that was it. Where the hell was I? Wasn't I supposed to me in excruciating pain? Wasn't I supposed to be bandaging up all the mental and physical wounds Charlie left me?

Charlie. Oh shit. Flashbacks of what had happened the last time I was awake flooded my brain. I gasped. _He_ had almost raped me. I had almost had my virginity stolen by my father in the cruelest way. And then I remembered my main problem at hand. Where the fuck was I?

Moving my left hand, I felt around it. Scratchy fabric was under me. Ugh. It was very uncomfortable. I tried to move my right hand again. I could move my fingers, just not my actual hand. It felt like it was strapped down or something. Then I heard voices again. They were closer this time. More definable. I heard a high pitched voice. It sounded hysterical. Almost as if they were crying. Why was such a beautiful voice crying? Then louder deeper voices appeared. They sounded strained. As if held on by a rope.

Then I recognized the higher voice. It was Alice. Why was Alice crying? Then I thought hard for a second. The voices when I blacked out. My right hand being tied down. The annoying beeping in the back. The scratchy sheets. And my unobtainable consciousness. _Oh crap. Oh shit. Oh damn. Oh fuck._

I was in the hospital. Multiple curses ran through my mind as I realized where I was. But only one pictured stayed. Charlie's purple face when I broke my arm when I was 13. I had done it in front of people so he was forced to take me to the hospital for image purposes. I received one of the worse beatings that night. If that was bad, what would happen tonight?

_Motherfuck_. That was the only word that ran through my maze of a mind. What was my story for the doctors? If Alice had brought me here then surely she must have an excuse. What did she say? How will I explain this to Charlie when I am not back in his bed? I shuddered at the thought.

But would he hit Alice? She brought me here. What would happen to her? I panicked at the thought. My heartbeat sped up immensely. Would he do to her what he did to me? Would she get her innocence stripped away like that? The annoying beeping seemed to double. It was beating faster and faster. I almost laughed. The heart monitor was mine.

Suddenly, the door burst in and I heard hurried footsteps beside me. A sweet sent filled the air. It was almost like Edward. I washed away that thought, but then it came back. Alice couldn't get me here by herself. She had to have had help. Was Edward with them? I started panicking again. My breathing became ragged and I felt my throat closing. The person next to me yelled out something unrecognizable and I heard another pair of footsteps. And soon, I was drifting off again.

I saw a light. Not the cliché death light. But a ceiling with a very very bright light above me. I cringed and closed my eyes again. I thought it might be worth it to look in the real world for a change. Not so much… I was about to force myself to sleep again when I heard the voice.

"But I have to see her! She is my sister! I can't just leave her in there!" It was quiet for a second. And then the shit hit the fan. "I don't fucking care if I don't have the damn parental consent for visitors!" I heard a loud bang. Something must have been slammed down. "It has been two fucking days and my dad is out of town! Let me see her!" she screamed at the top of her lungs.

I couldn't help the tears welling in my eyes. Two days? I have been sleeping for two days? And Charlie was out of town. Does that mean he left for good or he just wants an alibi. Either way I was happy. It meant he was gone. And at that thought, my door slammed open and in walked a pissed off Alice.

Her face was caked with streaked and wet mascara. She had obviously been crying. Her usual perfect hair was spiked in different directions and crazy. She was wearing the same clothes she left in on the day Charlie attacked me. And worse of all, her eyes were filled with so much pain it was almost unbearable.

"Bella!" she screamed and ran forward to hug me. Leaning her tiny frame over the guardrails, she hugged me with strength I only thought a body builder could manage. "Alice-…cant-…breathe" I choked out. She chuckled darkly and let go. Stepping back, her eyes appraised my appearance. I had not taken a look in the mirror nor did want to.

Silently, she went over and closed the door. She couldn't meet my eyes. I knew there was something wrong. Slowly, she sat down in the turquoise cheap plastic chair. I looked away, allowing her some privacy. Finally I heard it. Alice was sobbing against me. With my arm that wasn't strapped down, I gave her an awkward one-arm hug. She looked up. Her eyes puffy and red. "Isabella Marie Swan. Why the hell are you comforting me? You are the one in the fucking hospital, and you are comforting me." She looked away disgusted.

Pain hit me like a ton of bricks. She was disgusted at me. Silent tears ran down my face and I instantly found a heavy interest in the fake fruit painting on the wall. "Bella." I looked over again. She expression was blank. I couldn't tell what she was going to ask. "What did he do to you?" Instant tears hit my cheeks and I looked away again for the fifth time.

"Bella. What did he do to you?" she asked more sternly. "Isabella. What the hell did he do to you?" her voice was loud enough for other people to hear. I instantly "_sshhed"_ her. I couldn't afford this getting out. Not with the shit I am going to get from Charlie already. " I am not going to tell you." I said softly. Even though I was 6 inches taller than Alice was, I instantly felt small. She was so strong. She felt like the older sister.

"What did you tell them?" I asked quietly. She sighed and looked at her shoes. "I told them that I found you at the bottom of the stairs unconscious. And that Edward and Jasper helped me get you here." My head snapped up at the mention of his name. She looked at me pensively. "Why the hell were they there? What did they see? What happened?" I asked all in one breath. Taking in one very large gasp of air, she answered.

"I was bringing Jasper to meet Charlie. You know my new boyfriend" I was too strung I couldn't care less at the moment. " I told him it was a very bad idea and tried to stop him but he insisted. I made them wait outside while I went in. I found you upstairs crying you eyes out naked on your bed. Then you blacked out." Taking another breath, she mustered all the venom in her body and spit the life-changing phrase at me.

"I am going to ask you one more time. Isabella Marie Swan of Forks. What the hell happened? What the fuck did he do to you?" Looking down at my hands, I realized it was no good use. I retold her the events of my horrible mortifying night. She gasped at every opportune moment, and was hugging me tightly by the time I got to the bedroom. Shakily and with tears in my eyes, I told her every detail about what went down in my room. By the time I got to the end, she was in hysterics and crying on my shoulder.

Trying to comfort her, I put my good arm around her again and slowly rocked her. I was glad I didn't feel any pain because otherwise it would have been unbearable. "Oh I am sorry!" she blubbered. I continued to rock her. Trying to get her to stop. She shouldn't be hurting over me. "Oh my god! I am sorry. I should not have pushed you to tell me. I didn't know it was that bad. If only I would have known..." she trailed off and started in hysterics again.

After about 15 minutes, she looked up. Her eyes looked even worse than before. Appraising my appearance, she asked in a small voice. "Why are you not crying?" I shrugged. Of course I knew why. I knew _damn _well why. I had accepted it. It was going to happen sooner or later. Why not now? At least he left. And I deserved it. It was my fault that Renée died, so it was just payback. All of it was payback. And I took it. But yet I knew I deserved a lot worse. But I didn't tell her that.

"I don't know. I guess I have cried enough." She didn't believe me for a split second. That damn pixie knew me too well. "Bella don't you _dare_ go blaming yourself. You knew this is not your fault. Especially not someone like you. Not someone as smart, talented, and beautiful as you." I snorted what ever. Yeah right. She was about scold me, when my door opened again.

This time not slamming and not bearing a pissed off pixie. "Bella!" Emmett's booming voice shook the room. He rushed over like a little kid and gave me a bone-crushing hug. I winced slightly; grateful my pain meds were working. I laughed and turned to the door again. In walked Jasper, Rosalie, and last but not least Edward in all his shining god-like glory. Never had I seen him so guarded. Even though he was as beautiful as ever, his eyes were blank with emotion.

Looking away, hoping none else noticed my obvious ogling, a greeted everyone else. Jasper nodded in recognition, and Rosalie just scowled and looked away. I thought maybe she had warmed up to me a bit, but I guess I was wrong. "So Bells how are you feeling?" Emmett asked. Everyone turned and looked him incredulously. I couldn't help but giggle.

"I am fine but a bit loopy because of these damn pain killers." Everyone chuckled at that, trying to lighten the mood I guess. Emmett pumped his fist in the air. "Yes I have a hot and high chick!" I laughed and Rosalie shot me a scathing look. Slapping Emmett in the back of his hard head, she left the room.

Edward whispered something in her ear before she left, and she almost literally growled in his face. But Edward was not so intimidated. He met her killing stare and finally she left. I breathed a small sigh in relief. The tension was slightly less, but yet it still remained. "So how did a klutzy girl like you end up here?" Emmett asked. I caught Alice's eye for a second. That gave me an encouraging look. That was our story.

"Oh." I chuckled nervously. "I wasn't watching where I was going and tripped down the stairs. I guess it did more damage than I thought." Everyone laughed nervously except for Edward. His face contorted into a face of disgust and he looked away, almost is he has something sour in his mouth. I looked at him questionably. He met my gaze. I would have fainted of I wasn't lying down.

His emerald orbs held so much anger, hate, passion, worry, and something I else I could identify. But they knocked me back just by the force of them. He turned away and continued to stare at the wall. For the next couple hours, we all hung out in my room. They told me about what I had missed at school.

Evidently Lauren had spread some bullshit rumor about me and the janitor around the school. Claiming that I had physically assaulted her in the middle of class. I had to laugh at the one. "No I didn't physically. But I do think her stadium sized ego was a bit injured after that." After gaining an approval high five from Emmett, I sat back in my bed again. I was so tired, but I didn't want to admit it.

I had missed my friends and wanted to spend every possible second with them. After another joke about Lauren, a loud rumbling filled the room. An awkward silence replaced it, and all of a sudden a loud burst of obnoxious laughter came from Emmett. I blushed. That was Emmett's stomach. He just made the room shake from his bodily intestines, and he wasn't even embarrassed.

I was jealous. Insanely jealous. "It looks like little Emmett is hungry. Time to go feed him." And with that, he started for the door. "Oh really Emmett." He turned, curious. "I thought little Emmett was another of your body parts and I thought he was never not hungry." I smirked. His jaw dropped. I giggled at his expression. His mouth looked like a giant fishbowl.

And finally, a small chuckle from the corner of the room broke the silence. Jasper started it. From his modest chuckle, it went Alice's high-pitched hysterics and Edward's musical laugh. I giggled myself. Emmett still stood there like a fish out of water. "What is the matter Emmett? Rosalie got your tongue? Or _something_else…" I smirked again. This was just too easy. And finally, he cracked. His face lit up like a Christmas tree, and he stuck his fist out to me. "I gotta give you the props for this lil sis. They were awesome." I giggled again, bumping fists with him.

"Alright everybody! To the cafeteria!" he raised his hands like a banner and ran out of the room. Only Alice and Edward remained. Alice was the first to break the awkward silence. "Excuse me Edward, but if I could talk to my big sister privately, that would be great." She requested/slash told Edward. He got the hint, gave me a strange look, and walked out. I sighed. I was happily surprised that I could forget everything when my friends were here.

"So Bella…" she trailed off. For a first, I think she was speechless. "Yes Alice?" I egged on. I wanted to know what she wanted to talk about. "When are you going to tell?" she blurted out. I immediately froze and shrank back. Alice waited there, patiently, waiting for my answer. "I dunno." I answered easily.

"Bella. You can't keep letting this go on. You have to tell someone. What if he actually gets to you next time? What if he takes your virginity, or worse. Your life." She added solemnly. "But Alice." I sighed. This wasn't the first time we had had this discussion, "What am I going to say? That my father has been abusing me since I was 12 and that he has broken countless bones and that I was almost raped. And if it wasn't for some freaky accident I might not be here. You want me to tell that to the police? Hell, he is the police. What if he comes after you?" I stated my defense all in one breath.

I had some good points. She knew it. "Bella." She stated firmly. "If you don't tell someone in the next week, I swear to god I will tell. I will tell the hospitals, then it would explain all the bruises and scars on your body and maybe the hickey on your chest. I will tell the teachers and that would explain all of your late absences and non-participation in gym. I will tell Lauren's mom, the woman that works at the pharmacy that sees you buying makeup frequently when you don't even go out. I swear to god that I will tell everyone. And then we will see what happens." With that statement and a firm glare my way, she gracefully stomped out the door.

I sat back and started thinking. Would she really do it? My answer was right there. Of course she would do it. After about 5 minutes of me weighing possibilities, a knock at the door alerted me awake. "Come in!' I called not caring who it was. The door opened and in walked Edward. I breathed a sigh of admiration. Almost as if he was dancing, he walked to the chair beside me and looked at his shoes.

"Yes Edward…" I egged on. I seemed to be doing this a lot. Why did he come in here? He looked up. For the second time, I almost melted in his eyes. They held nothing but love and devotion. He took my hand. But yet he still had not said anything. I admit it. I was nervous. What if he told me he never wanted to see me again? What if he told me he finally saw me as the piece of trash I was and tossed me out the door? What if-

"Do you trust these doctors?" he asked suddenly. I nodded slowly. "Do you trust me?" I didn't even have to think about it. I nodded more aggressively this time. "Then why in god's name are you fucking lying to them?" I was startled. Why did he think that? What clued him in? "Why d-...do you think that?" I asked shakily.

He looked away and sighed. When he turned back, his eyes that held love and devotion before now held nothing but pure hate and passion.

"Maybe because I heard you and Alice talking in the bathroom. Maybe because I saw the reluctance when you talked about your family. Maybe I saw the pure fear in your eyes when Alice mentioned your father. Maybe I noticed the scars on your wrists and the bruises that you try so hard to cover up. Maybe because I have seen through every lie you have told. And maybe because I heard you crying in your room, and when Alice called us in, you were wrapped in nothing but a sheet, bloody, and unconscious, saying that you fell down the stairs in your towel. And-" he cut off, breathing for a second, and continued. "And maybe because I think I love you and will stop and nothing to protect you."

And with that, he slowly and softly pushed his lips against mine. I froze, expecting unpleasant memories to come back, but when none came, I leaned forward and kissed him back. I was in heaven. His lips tasted like honey, and I had a renewable source of them right in front of me.

He soft breath blew against me, and his sweet manly scent assaulted my nostrils. Gently, he wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me up as far as I could go. I melted into his arms. I got a burst of sudden confidence. My tongue grazed his bottom lip, begging for entrance. She pushed harder against me, but opened his mouth. My tongue swam around his mouth, tasting him.

We were so caught up in the moment; we didn't hear the thud of heavy boots running down the hall and into our room until it was to late.

The door jumped open, and there stood Charlie.

**

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**

Hold on! Let me board up the doors and windows. Okay now attack. Sorry about the cliffy... okay not really but still...

**Yes so the drama is of course not over yet. What kind of a writer would I be? Anyway... I have a proposition for yall. I will give yall two songs. One is a bonus. If two people guess it right, you get a new chapter tomorrow. Yes i know. But it is a very hard song. Not many know of it. But we will see.**

**Song One**

**_Run, baby, run  
Don't ever look back.  
They'll tear us apart  
If you give them the chance.  
Don't sell your heart.  
Don't say we're not meant to be.  
Run, baby, run.  
Forever will be  
You and me._**

**Song Two! (Bonus)**

**_I work at customer service for a phone company  
I make 12 bucks an hour but that's all I need  
I live in a small apartment on a quiet street  
I don't go out too much I like to _****_watch TV_**  
**_I cant afford a car I use public transportation  
I don't mind I read 'til I reach my destination  
sometimes a newspaper, sometimes a book  
the amount of money I save this shit is off the hook_**

**Alright! There you go! now R&R!**

**-Avery**


	7. Chapter 6

****

Wow. That was an awesome response to that chapter! I thought I was going to be able to relax for a couple days, but then I saw that almost everyone of you got the song right. So I am keeping my promise.

**I had reviewer that pointed out something to me. It was anonymous, but if they read the story, I would like them to read this. They said that the first chapter was very unrealistic. I beg to differ. The entire story is based off of my life in a certain time period, just put into Twilight Characters. If I were offended easily, I would have been offended. But I am not. Instead I see your point, and respect your opinion. But I do have to say that it did happen and he did wipe my tears.**

**So to the dedications! The first song was:**

**_Check Yes Juliet by We the Kings_. **

**One of my personal favorites.**

**Ibetagainstalice, Miss.Megan, Neverforget99, KrisCullen, Annie McPenguin, briiittx xhc, lol silly bella, UrEveryDayDork, bc, cullengal!**

**And to one that didn't get the songs, but left a totally awesome review…dvorndran!!**

**And I saw an even bigger response with the other song. I was totally shocked because I came in on it by mistake, so I didn't know that anyone else knew it. It was **

**_Everyday Normal Guy by Jon Lajoie!_**

**Ibetagainstalice, Miss.Megan, BellaxMariexCullen, Neverforget99, KrisCullen, lol silly bella, UrEveryDayDork, cullengal !! Great job guys! Thanks!**

**Anyway…Onward…!!**

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His face instantly turned puce and his black eyes bugged out of his head. Edward's cold arm kept in front of me almost like a shield. I didn't even try to move. I was frozen. My father caught my french kissing a guy that wasn't even my boyfriend and who knew about what happened to me. The only thing that ran through my mind was curse words. Some I didn't even knew existed, they just came up out of nowhere.

Charlie moved forward like a lion stalking his prey. That was when my brain decided to work. "Edward" I hissed. He moved his head so slightly Charlie didn't notice. "Get out of here. I don't want you to be in trouble." He shook his head silently. I knew it was no use now. He wouldn't move.

Charlie inched forward and was about to yell when the door behind him opened. A young man, clearly not older than 30 walked in. He had blond hair that was styled perfectly and was very handsome. Not looking at the deadly situation in front of him, he walked looking down at my chart, to the side of my bed. He hooked another bag onto the IV feed, and finally looked around. "Hello Bella. I am Dr. Carlisle Cullen. I would like to talk to you about your situation. Would you like privacy?"

I looked at Charlie. His penetrating glare was directed at my face and clearly said no. So I only had one choice. "Yes please." I squeaked out. "Excuse me doctor, but I have a right to be here. I am Bella's father after all." Charlie spoke up in a tone I had never heard before. It actually contained some decency. And that scared me.

"I understand sir. But Isabella has requested privacy. I recommend that you give that to her." Charlie, obviously not wanting to argue, gave me one more death glare and walked out mumbling obscenities. Dr. Cullen turned to Edward. "Edward. I expect the same of you." My heart dropped. I couldn't let him go out there with Charlie. It was too dangerous. Edward gave me a pleading glance. I grabbed his hand and quickly I spoke up.

"Um if it isn't to much Dr. Cullen, could Edward please stay here?" I looked up hopefully. He gave his son a pointed look and chuckled. "Yes it is okay. Most people don't feel comfortable with their parents anyway." Edward stiffened next to me. I was sure that my posture copied his. "And please call me Carlisle. Dr. Cullen makes me feel old." We both chuckled.

His laughing manner suddenly turned professional. "So I have to discuss you injuries Bella. They are very severe." He looked down at my hopeless face and continued. "You have three fractured ribs, and bruises on your torso. You untreated cuts covering your body. Three are infected. Your left wrist is sprained as well as your right ankle." He sighed and looked down. I knew the next question he was going to ask.

"Ms. Swan. I need to ask you about your home life. Are there any specific problems? You injuries are not consistent with your fall. As well as you ribs. One of the fractures has already started to heal. But it is healing wrong. That concludes that they did happen recently, but not two days ago. The fracture is at least a week old.." Edward instantly became more intense. I had not told him about my injuries. He thought I just got hit. He didn't know that there were any wounds...

Could I tell him now? What would happen to Charlie? What would he do? Silent tears started to run down my face. Carlisle, knowing he wasn't going to get an answer then, subtly left. Giving my and Edward privacy. More tears ran down my face as I went over my options. After my last display, they would know something was up. "What do I do?" I asked weakly. I didn't even think that Edward could hear me. "Bella." He said softly.

I didn't answer. My mind was only on Charlie. "Bella look at me." He said more sternly. I turned my head, tears still flowing down my face. Soft fingers ran down my cheeks. They gently grabbed my chin and pulled up. I lifted my head, only to stare into Edward's eyes. They were full of compassion and sympathy. "Bella. I couldn't stand to hear your injuries. The fact that you went through all of the physical and mental abuse from Charlie and didn't tell anyone I really can't comprehend. But I believe you need to tell now. If you don't, he will continue to hurt you. I can't let that happen, love. I believe you need to tell them. Get this all over. He won't be able to hurt you or Alice anymore." He leaned in slowly and gently pressed his lips against mine again.

I breathed in deeply and pushed back. My heart monitor was going crazy. He wrapped his hands tightly around my waist and brought my closer to him. My hand tangled in his hair. His bronze luscious locks slipped through my fingers. Just as Edward's tongue grazed my lip, the room door opened and in walked Carlisle again.

I blushed. I probably invented a new shade of red. Now both fathers had caught us. But Carlilse's reaction surprised me. He simply chuckled and muttered something about _teenagers_. But then his expression turned serious again. But before he could ask, I said my life changing words before I lost my courage.

Looking down at my hands, not meeting anyone's gaze, I muttered. "Yes Carlisle. There are problems. And I want them stopped." I whispered it so softly, I was surprised either one of them heard me. But I heard Carlisle's slight gasp, and Edward's arms wrapping around me again. "Well than Bella. I will have an officer attend to your father, and a female officer will be in here shortly. I know it will be hard, but we need to know what happens." I nodded, and he walked swiftly out of the room.

"I am so proud of you." He put his lips to my forehead. Soon his lips were covering my hair and my neck. Moaning slightly, I leaned back, and used all of my will power to push his head away. "Edward." I let out in a breathy moan. "No." he continued to press his lips into my skin. "Are you sure?" The slight vibration of lips almost sent me crazy. But I had to make him stop. "Edward. I am in the hospital waiting for an officer to interview me. Please control your teenage male hormones." He chuckled, but relented.

He kept on to my hand though. I was glad he did. That was about the only thing keeping me sane. My mind was spinning. Everything had happened so quickly. I didn't feel free though. Almost like they had given me a bigger cage. There were still too many ties that held me down. I was snapped out of my depressing thought when a woman in a police uniform walked through the door.

For some reason I felt comfortable around her. I think that was her purpose, but it was working. "Hello. I am Officer Baldridge." She stuck out her hand. I took mine out of Edward's, and shook it. "You must be Bella." I nodded. I didn't want to speak yet. The butterflies were coming back, but I didn't regret my decision. She turned her gaze to Edward. "And you are…?" she trailed off.

Edward stuck out his hand and smiled politely. "I am Edward Cullen. Bella's friend." I smiled. She shook her hand and pulled up another chair to the side of the bed. I took Edward's hand again. I couldn't do this without him. "Bella. I know this is going to very hard for you. We can stop when you feel overwhelmed, but our main purpose is to get the information. Are you willing to participate?" I nodded, meeting her gaze.

"Great. Well that makes things easier. I am going to start off easily." She emitted a sigh. I braved myself for the worst. "When did the abuse start?" I let out a breath of air that I had been holding. And from that, I started my story. Telling her the horrible things that Charlie had done. Edward sat by me the entire time. he tensed up at every story, every detail, but he never left.

Halfway through my terrible tale, the tears started falling. I had been able to keep them off for as long as I could, but as I reached the worse parts, they had to be let free. Edward had got up for a spilt second and retrieved tissues, but then was back in his place. When I was almost finished, the door burst open. Alice and the crew were back from the cafeteria. "Bella! We have food!" Emmett's voice rang out through the room.

He skipped in, but stopped short when he saw my company. The next thing I saw was a blur of black and white and a loud squeal as Alice ran to hug me. She squeezed me tight. "I knew you would do the right thing." She whispered in my ear. Tears were coming out of her eyes harder than mine were. I smiled and hugged her back. They were tears of happiness.

Finally she let go and looked at the officer. She made a face, but ushered the other confused kids out. I could imagine what was going on in their mind. Right before Alice left, she turned around. "Would you like me to tell them?" I was glad she was leaving it up to me. I looked up to Edward. He kissed my forehead and gave me an encouraging smile. I turned back to Alice. She had an ecstatic expression. I almost laughed. "Yes please." She nodded, gave me one more proud look, and closed the door.

Officer Baldridge was still sitting there, clipboard in hand, with a blank look on her face. "I am sorry about that. Those were my friends and my sister." I apologized quickly. "Oh don't worry about it sweetie. You needed a quick break." After that, we continued. It was getting harder and harder to tell, to relive the horrifying memories, the pain, but with Edward's chaste kisses here and there, his thumb rubbing circles on my hand, the small but affectionate things, I did it. But the point that I froze was the last incident.

Officer Baldridge noticed my hesitation. "Do you need to take a break?" she asked kindly. I shook my head. No I didn't. I could get through it. Edward's free hand gravitated to my neck and started rubbing small circles. It had an instant effect. I was instantly calmed. "Once he picked me up from school, he drove me to the house. He didn't speak the whole way. When we got home, he got out before me and went up to the house." I stopped for a second, putting a hand on my neck where the bruises were.

"I stepped inside and he grabbed my neck, choking me, and threw me against the couch. He started screaming curses at me, calling me a whore and making very crude remarks." I stopped again, remembering the pain when he called me a whore. Remembering when me made the remarks about Edward. I gulped and looked up at him. The same encouraging crooked smile was still in place. But it was different. It looked more forced and tight. I looked down at out linked hands. He had a reason for that.

"I didn't respond to his remarks, and the next thing I knew there was a knife cutting my cheek. I was shocked and he cut down my arm. He stopped for a second and then stabbed my leg, dragging the blade down. "Edward stiffened as I brought the hospital gown up slightly and showed them the long inch deep cut on my thigh. I flipped my arm and showed them the cut. It wasn't deep enough to hit any major arteries, so I was lucky. I looked up at Officer Baldridge. She had tears in her eyes. I couldn't blame her. The story was very pathetic. I sounded like a helpless child.

"I passed out from the pain and woke up in my room. Everything was bandaged, courtesy of Alice. After a while I got up to take a shower, when I got out I walked to my room in a towel. As I was about to go in Charlie saw me." I stopped for a second, wiping away the stray years that were running down my cheeks. Edward could tell where this was going and he placed a delicate kiss on my forehead, encouraging me to go on.

"I ran into my room, hoping he didn't see me. He did. He made a nasty remark, and burst the door open. He reached for my towel, but I bit his hand, and he slapped me in the face. I was trying everything. I wasn't going to let what he wanted to happen. I collapsed from the pain in my cheek. He had reopened the cut. He grabbed at my towel again and pulled it down." Tears were running down my face even harder now as I remembered his disgusting face filled with lust as he saw my body.

Edward was sitting in the front of his chair, looking like he was going to spring at what ever moved. Officer Baldridge was wiping her own tears out of her eyes this time.

"I grabbed the nearest sheet and ran to other side of the room screaming as loud as I could. But no one heard me. I kicked him, but that just made him madder. He picked me up and threw me against my bed. He trapped my arms and legs and took off his own clothes. He started touching me again. Squeezing me and hurting me. He was about to complete the rape, but his work phone rang and he got off and told me to stay there until he came back. I was crying so hard that I passed out. I believe that was when Alice got me."

By the time I had finished my statement I was barely translatable. The sobs that racked my body made it hard to talk but I had completed it. I had completed the horrors of my life. I looked at Edward through blurry eyes. He had silent tears running down his face was well. Noticing my gaze, he picked himself up and wrapped his arms around my waist, holding my tight to him, whispering words in my ear. His soothing voice calmed me down, and I was able to look at Officer Baldridge.

Her face was barely visible by the amount of tissue covering it. I was sure mine was the same. Once she got steady she responded. "Bella. I must say that was quite the tale. I am sorry. I know you don't want pity, but I can tell you right now. There is enough physical evidence to put him up for life. But we are going to need you to testify."

I drew in a shaky breath. "Do you think you could do that? I know for a fact it would put him away for good." I didn't have to think twice. Nodding my head, I took Edward's hand again and kissed it. "Good. I am glad that you would." After a small silence, she spoke again. "Bella." She sighed. "I have one more thing I need to speak with you about. And I think it would be better if Edward left. No offense to you, but it would be better." I shook my head politely.

"What ever you can say in front of me you can say in front of him." She nodded understandingly. "While you were unconscious, we took a TOX scan. We needed to know if you might have been under the influence of something. I think you know this, but it came back positive for crack cocaine."

I took in a breath. I had not counted on this coming up. Edward looked down at me. I couldn't meet his gaze. I didn't want to see the accusation in his beautiful orbs. "Yes I did know that." Officer Baldridge drew in a breath and continued. "Bella. I need to know the details of that. It isn't standard protocol, but it may help the case." I nodded, I understood. Squeezing Edward's hand, I got the courage to look up. His emerald eyes were filled with pity and shame. I shot my head down, regretting my decision.

"When I was 12, after my mother's death and after Charlie had started hurting me, I went to a birthday party. The boy's older brother got us all to try the coke. No one else liked it but me. For me it was an escape from all my problems. From all the shit in my life. Since then, I had used a small amount after every one of Charlie's beatings. It helped me get over the pain and helped me feel free."

I kept my gaze down, to afraid to look up again.

"I am willing to give it all up. I don't have reason for it now. I know it will be hard. But I am willing to give it all up. But I know I will need help." I finally got the spark to look up. Edward was gazing out the window, deep in thought. Officer Baldridge was scribbling away on her clipboard.

After about a minute, she looked up again. "Okay Bella. I will see what I can do about a rehab program. In the meantime it was be best to give the remaining drugs to us, to make sure they are not used. I will give you two 5 minutes of privacy until I send your friends in. Charlie has been taken into custody already. I promise I will do my best to keep him there." She got up and shook my hand. "Stay safe Bella and Edward." And with that she walked out the door.

I took Edward's hand. It was a minute before I spoke. "Please say something Edward." More tears were running down my face. Suddenly a cool finger drooped down and swiped them all away. I turned toward Edward. He sighed and studied his shoes.

"What do you want me to say Bella?"

"I don't know…anything." My voice cracked with the last word. He looked up. His burning gaze caught me off guard. His eyes were now full with passion and hate. "Do you want me to say the fact that I could kill Charlie by my self for putting you through what he did? Or how about the fact that he drove you to use illegal substances just to get away from him? Or that he almost took away your innocence for some cheap pleasure? Or the fact that it has been barely a week, but I am scared to death because of the passion that I feel for you and the need to protect you?"

He took a shaky breath and started again. "Bella. Right now no one can make up for your child hood. No one should have to go through what you did." I opened my mouth to protest, but he cut me off. "Bella don't you dare blame this all on yourself. You and I both know that this was a one-man show. It was in no way your fault. So don't you dare say that you deserve it." I closed my mouth.

I didn't believe him, but I let it sink in a bit. He had a small point. But still… it was my stupid request that Renée left home, so it was still partly my fault. I continued my thoughts until Edward grabbed my face and gently turned it so it faced him. "Bella…" he whispered. I was frozen. "Will you be my girlfriend?" It was to perfect.

He leaned forward slightly and I met him halfway. Our lips moved in sync together. His fingers caressed my cheek and it sent pleasurable shivers up my spine. My hands moved to his silky curls and pulled his head closer. His tongue entered my mouth, and we wrestled for dominance. I moaned slightly in his mouth when his hands slid to my hair, massaging my head slightly.

And for the third time that day, the burst open and Alice and our friends burst in with balloons and streamers. "Bell-" they stopped short as they saw my messed up hair and swollen lips. I was sure Edward was the same. I turned my gaze from them and looked at Edward.

He smiled crookedly and whispered in my ear. "So is that a _yes_?" I nodded slightly. He grinned even wider. The last thing I heard was Alice's glass breaking shriek.

* * *

**There! I kept my promise! Even it was very hard because I have a raging headache. So I really didn't think I wrote that that the best I could. It was very hard to put the experience into words. I think i could have done better, but I just don't know how. I left you a little sweet ending instead of a cliff hanger. Aren't you proud of me?! This chapter was the second longest one and I did it in less than 24 Hrs! I am proud of myself. It was 40118 words!**

**Also, several readers have asked me about different POVs. I believe that is a great idea. But i will do hem off of requests only. So if you request a certain scene with a certain person, I will do it. I probably will do a different story with the "outtakes." So thank you who requested it. **

**Anyway... so I was trying to decide a beginning for this chapter. I couldn't think of a good way to start it so I went downstairs, got a pint of Ben & Jerry's, and came back up. Ben & Jerry's is a miracle worker!! Especially their new flavor. "Imagine Whirled Peace!!" It is the best stuff in the world!**

**Here is your song!**

**_You change your mind  
Like a girl changes clothes  
Yeah you, PMS  
Like a bitch  
I would know_**

**_And you over think  
Always speak  
Cryptically  
I should know  
That you're no good for me_**

**Another one of my very favorites!! I have a new poll up on my profile! Please check it out!**

**R&R!**

**-Avery**


	8. Chapter 7

**Wow. Okay. Sorry about the last chapter. Each time I tried to put it up I didn't come out the way I wanted it too. Anyway… the song was **

**_Hot N' Cold by Katy Perry_. **

**And the dedications are…**

**lol silly bella, Annie McPenguin, cullenga, KrisCullen, deborahj, UrEveryDayDork, and dvorndran!!**

**So, if you didn't read the many times I messed up and had to repost the chapter, I had an idea. Several readers have asked me about different POVs. I have already considered something like that, but now with their suggestions it just makes me want to do even more. So, on request I will do scenes that yall ask for in the person's POV that you request. I don't know who or what you want, so please ask.**

**Anyway… Onward!!….**

* * *

After Alice's ear drum-popping squeal, she ran as fast as she could to me. Giving another ecstatic look to Edward, she bent down and hugged me to where I couldn't breathe. Choking out a laugh, I lightly hugged Alice back. Her happiness cracked me up. "I can't believe you two are together!" she screamed in my ear.

"Alice… please keep it down. I don't think my ears could take any more." I joked, rubbing my sensitive ear. She pouted and went over to the door. Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie still stood there with matching shocked expressions. Giggling like the little girl she was, she tugged on Jasper's arm and led him over to the bed. "Jasper, in case you have not registered it yet, may I introduce you to Bella. My big sister and Edward's girlfriend."

The girlfriend part must have caught everyone's attention, because suddenly everyone was crowding around the bed. Emmett's eyes were filled with joy and pity. Two things that never should be mixed. I smiled weakly at them. I turned to glance at Rosalie. She no longer had the sour expression on her face, but one of understanding and pride. And Jasper's face still contained mild confusion. Finally someone spoke. But it was the one person who I wished wouldn't. "Bella. Would it be alright if we each had a turn to talk to you privately?" Rosalie asked from behind Emmett.

Her nervous voice caught me off-guard. Rosalie was on the most confident people I know. She was never nervous. Nodding, I turned to Edward. "Do you mind leaving so I can talk?" his facial expression remained impassive, but I could see that the happiness in his eyes lessened a bit. "Sure. Who wants to talk first?" he asked maturely to the group. Emmett started jumping with his hand in the air like a little boy.

"Pick me! Pick me!" Rosalie smacked him across the back of his head. I laughed and decided to mess with him. "_Anyone_?" I pretended to look around. At every turn of my head, Emmett's whole body went with it. Barely keeping a straight face, I asked. "Emmett. Do you need something?" he stopped jumping and his lips slipped into a pout. I laughed again and gestured him forward.

As everyone left, the familiar butterflies filled my stomach. Would I be able to do this without Edward?

Finally, Emmett settled down and sat in the chair next to me. His childish demeanor seemed miles away now. His usually bright face now only held pity and sorrow. The two things that hated form other people. "Bella…" he muttered. I turned to him, afraid to meet his eyes. "I am so sorry for everything you went through. I can't imagine having to do that. I-" he stopped for a second. "I want to know why you didn't tell anyone. If you don't want to tell me because you barely know me, I understand. But I really want to know." I sighed. I don't know what it was about this family. Everything about them made me feel like I could trust them with my deepest and darkest secrets.

"Emmett. I hate seeing my favorite teddy bear so upset." He smiled weakly. "But I don't know why. At the beginning, I had so many excuses. Where would Alice and me go? What would we do? Would he hurt me more?" he flinched at the last statement. "But after a while I ran out of excuses. But I will tell you this truthfully. If it weren't for Alice taking me here, I probably would not have told. I told here because I realized I could have a normal life. I just needed to let go of a couple things." He nodded, satisfied with my answer. "Alrighty then." The big bear leaned over the bed and gave me another huge hug.

"Alright kiddo. I will send someone else in." and with that he walked out, winking at me at the doorway. I leaned back. That was easier than I had expected. I took a deep breath. I knew I was going to have to do this sooner or later. So why not now? The door cracked open again and in walked in Jasper. I couldn't really think of what he was going to ask or talk about. He sat down where Emmett was 2 minutes later. He clasped his hands and looked me straight in the eye.

"Bella. I am not here to pity you or anything. But how could you hurt Alice? I am glad that you are getting better, but how?" Of course. Of course he would worry about Alice. This guy was perfect for my sister. "Will all due respect Jasper, I was protecting her more than either of you know. Alice doesn't understand it, so I doubt you would either. But the thing was I didn't want to hurt her. I didn't want her to see my scars or know my stories. Jasper, they were my pain. I didn't want to burden her with any of that. It was hard enough that I saw her tears when she had to clean or she finally saw glimpses of my injuries. But I didn't want her to go through that. And I didn't tell because what if Charlie went to Alice?" he visibly shuddered.

I knew how he was thinking. How could anyone hurt her? "So you see my point. I didn't want anything to happen to her. And I wish that you and her could understand that." I pleaded. I didn't want to start off badly with him. I didn't want to start off any badly with any of them. It is all ready bad that in the first week they know me, they find out one of my worst secrets and introduce themselves into the _Swan Secret Life_.

Jasper nodded and kissed my forehead in a brotherly way. "I hope you get better Bella." He backed up and walked out the door. I leaned back again. This was becoming a repetitive process. I waited for the next person as I thought over my talk with Jasper. Of course he had to see my side. I hoped he did. I just didn't want anything to happen to my baby sister.

The door opened again and the last person I thought would come, walked through.

Rosalie danced across the hospital floor in all of her goddess glory. I was almost in awe. The only thing holding me back was Edward, whom I thought was better. I laughed internally. Such a selfish thought. Rosalie gracefully sat down and took my hand. "How are you feeling Bella?" she asked politely. "I am dong better. Thank you for asking Rose." I answered, matching her tone.

Her eyes seemed to analyze my face. Stopping at every bruise and scar. With each wound her eyes dropped into more fury. I shrank back. The look in her eyes was terrifying. "Bella…" she sighed. "I am not going to ask you why you didn't tell, because I know myself. But why didn't you let anyone help you? Alice was there, trying to help you but you denied her." It took a second for me to process her words. "You mean- you-" I stuttered.

"Yes Bella. My step dad abused me. But I am not here to talk about myself. I am angry with you. Here I thought you were just a pathetic weak girl," I winced at her words, realizing the truth in them. "But you wouldn't let anyone help you! Do you know how much I wished there was someone there for me? But you- you pushed the help away and wallowed in self-pity. Why?" she almost yelled.

I thought for a second. I knew I could trust Rosalie. She had just trusted me with one of her secrets. I could trust her with mine. " I will tell you why Rose." I took in a deep breath and started. "I didn't because of what you just said. I was a pathetic weak girl. I didn't want anyone to help me. It was my burden. Who would help a ugly plain girl that has a couple problems in her life? Alice is my sister, but if she helped me, she would have probably gotten hurt as well. Let me ask you something Rosalie. Would you ever forgive yourself if something happened to Jasper if he tried to help you? If your step dad pulled a gun that was meant for you, but shot him instead, would you ever let up on the pain? The physical wounds could heal. But I would never look at myself the same if Alice had gotten hurt. I am tougher physically, and look where it ended me. What if Alice was lying here? What if it was Jasper?" I finished my rant with tears running down my cheeks.

All I could imagine was Alice strapped to a bed with tubes sticking out all over her body, on a ventilator, cut up like I was. If she had head the things I had. Then I imagined another picture. Charlie leaned over a naked Alice on the bed. Her crying and begging as Charlie hurt her. Shaking my head, the tears ran down harder. And then I had even even worse image. It was like there was slides behind me eyes, but no one was controlling the projector. Alice, bent over a white sheet with fine powder on it. No. I stopped my visions right there. I couldn't handle even an imagined Alice dong that.

I looked to Rosalie. She had tears running down her perfect face. Probably imagining the same thing I was, just with Jasper. She had to understand how I felt. "Do you get what I mean?" I asked softly. Biting her lip, she nodded.

"I know Bella. I was too embarrassed to admit it. That a girl like me was weak enough to let that happen to her. And if Jasper-" she cut off right there. I let it settle for a second. "Rose, I am glad you understand. But there is one more thing. Did Jasper know?" she shook her head. I gasped in surprise. "How did you keep it from him?" she looked me straight in the eye. Blue to brown.

"Jasper hung out in a different crowd. He was always home late. Always after Royce beat me. I never left my room without lots of make-up. I never let on with the pain. I kept it all inside until one day, a kid from Jasper's group pushed me down. My sweater rode up a bit and Jasper saw the large hand print bruise and cut that Royce had left on me. I got up and the wrists of my sleeve came back a bit, and you could see the cuts along my arm." She shook her head, trying to dispel the image.

"You could see the understanding in his eyes. The fury, but most of all the pain. He felt betrayed that I had not told him. No one else noticed, so they continued to tease me. Jasper stood in front of me like a guard dog, and cussed them out." She took another long breath and continued.

"He drove me home. When I got home, Royce came out like he always did, not seeing Jasper in the car. He dragged me out and began to hit me. For the first time Jasper had seen the wrath of him. He jumped out of the car and attacked him from behind. He knocked him out and drove me to the hospital. My secret got out. We got put into foster care, and here we are now." She added with an empty laugh.

I thought over what she said. She looked out the window and was deep in thought. Salty tears were still in our eyes. "He started when I was 12. My mother had died and he blamed it on me. It got worse over the years. Alice never knew. She was her own person. She came home early one day to see Charlie cutting me when I was 15." I stopped. Cringing at the horror on her face as she saw what he did.

"After that, she always tried to help me. But I couldn't. Like you said, I was embarrassed. I was embarrassed that this was happening. I was embarrassed that it took me thirty minutes every morning to cover up what one hour of Charlie's wrath." I stopped again, squeezing my eyes shut. " I just recently let her see my wounds. Up until then I had always dressed them myself, but I had really needed help. So in the bathroom of the school, I showed her everything. I was ashamed. I was ashamed that a girl like her had a dead-beat sister like me. Almost like it was baggage for her." Rose took my hand.

I felt comfortable in her presence. "She never got to go out because of me. She never got to have fun because of me. She never came down stairs when Charlie came home. I was just so ashamed you know?" Rose nodded. Understanding in her eyes.

Looking her in eyes, I asked her a straight up question. "Rose, did you ever do drugs?" she didn't even flinch. Just simply nodded her head. "To get away from the pain." We both said together. I had one more question to ask her, but I didn't know how.

"Um… Rose?" her head snapped up. "Did Royce ever… hurt you in a different way?" It took her a second, but then realization dawned in her eyes. Looking down at her hands, she nodded. "More than once." She added. With that she leaned over the rail, and squeezed me to death. I couldn't believe it. Someone as pretty as Rosalie had been hurt in the same way I had. She'd had the same horrible experiences, the same pain, and because of this, I felt a connection to her.

It was understandable, but I felt like a sister to her. We held each other for a couple more minutes, sobbing into each others shoulder. Finally, she broke away, laughing weakly. "I should better go. I bet Alice is waiting to get her hands on you." I laughed without humor along with her. She squeezed my hand one more time and walked gracefully out of the room. I leaned back again. Tears were still running down my cheeks.

I had a new sister. Someone I could relate to when it got too tough. The white hospital door opened once again. In walked the little sprite. She had a true smile of happiness on her face. I laughed. Nothing could take away her enthusiasm. Skipping to the bed, she kissed my forehead and sat down where the other three Cullen's had been.

"Bella. I am so proud of you. I am so proud you got the courage to tell someone. I couldn't believe you did it this soon. What brought it on?" I knew in the second that she asked what the answer was. "Edward." I answered simply. As if that answered all the other questions. "Well again… as proud as I am of you, why couldn't you pick another place to swoon the poor boy?" she joked. And for the first time in months, I laughed a real laugh. Not some pansy fake painted laugh, a real Bella laugh. Because she was so right. The first new boy that comes into town I pick up in the hospital. I chuckled to myself. It was so… Bella style.

Alice was about to continue on, when the door opened unexpectedly. "Ms. Swan, I have the number for several rehab clinics around here. Pick which one suits you the best, and we will make the call." A cheerful nurse chirped. Alice sat frozen in the chair next to me. Her eyes were glazed over. Only when the nurse left after giving me the paper did she snap back. "Rehab clinic?" she asked with a hint of pain and anger in the flat tone. I nodded, unable to speak.

"I see." She said, bobbing her head ans biting her lip. Suddenly, she slammed her hand onto the bedside table. "God dammit Bella! I cant believe you!" Now it was my turned to be shocked. Alice never cursed Today was the most I heard her curse…ever. And the fact that she did it at me…

"_Drugs_! I can't believe you! BELLA! Fucking drugs! What kind of idiot are you? You could have come to me or anyone else, but you chose drugs? What the _fuck_ Bella?! How could you?" More tears welled in my eyes. She was in pain. And I had caused it. Drops of salt water dripped from Alice's eyes as she paced the room, cursing me and the rest of the world out. "Alice." I said. She didn't stop. "Alice." I said slightly louder. She still didn't notice. "_Alice_!" said loud and stern. She jumped in mid-stride and turned to face me with a puzzled expression on her face.

"Alice please sit down. I need to explain some things to you." She glanced at the turquoise chair, made a face, but sat anyway. "Alice. I know I have been a complete idiot." She opened her mouth to protest, but I cut her off. "Don't say anything. Just please, let me finish." I took another breath and started again. "I know I have been a complete idiot. I knew how bad the cocaine was, but it did it anyway. It was my fault. Purely my fault. But I am willing to change. I am absolutely dedicated to it. So please, stop cussing out the rest of the world. It doesn't help." She stared at me for a couple minutes, processing what I said.

Finally, she exhaled a large breath. "Fine. But I get to pick out your clothes for the next four dates you go on with Edward!" She demanded in a total Alice fashion. I chuckled and shook her hand on the deal. Only Alice would bargain such things. The atmosphere in the room was ten tons lighter after that. We joked and caught up on things for a little while. Eventually, we saw the clock and Alice gasped. "Oh I am so sorry! I didn't realize how long I was taking! Here I will leave so that your man can come in!" Dashing out on her heels, I didn't even get to tell her to stop.

I huffed in irritation and fell back onto the bed in frustration. A musical chuckle came from the doorway. my head snapped up. There stood my god in person. "Did I tell you how cute you look when you are frustrated?" he chuckled. I blushed. He was complimenting the very things I hated.

He gracefully crossed the room and landed a kiss on my cheek. He was about to sit down, when the door opened again. A miffed nurse walked in. She had on scrubs with the first couple of buttons unbuttoned, and about a pound of make-up on her face. " I am sorry Mr. Cullen, but visiting hours are over. Isabella needs her rest, and your privilege of daddy's boy doesn't work with me." She turned on her heel, and stuck her nose in the air as she walked out.

I stifled a giggle. Jealous much? "Someone got shot down by your father." I giggled. Turning to Edward, he faced me and I was rewarded with a dazzling crooked grin on his face. "I guess that is my cue to leave huh?" his face dropping by the second. "Yes I guess." I answered, lacking any enthusiasm. He leaned down and put a small kiss on my lips. "Tomorrow you get out of the hell hole, so we will talk at home alright?" he whispered, his sweet breath blowing in my face.

I nodded, not fully understanding the words. He chuckled at my dazzled state and started for the door. "Oh and Isabella…" My head snapped up again. "Tomorrow, you are coming to meet my parents. You and Alice both. So be prepared." That and his trademark crooked grin, she walked swiftly out of the room.

I sighed and leaned back once more. And then his words sunk in. all of his words. _Talking tomorrow and meeting his parents_. The two things I dreaded the most.

* * *

**Not really a cliffhanger. I am sorry that the speeches were a but repetitive, but that was what it was like. You basically had to explain yourself hundreds of times. Oh, and yes. Alice took the place of my best friend, Jaylin. Like the good friend she is, she cussed me out in the hospital room telling me every thing I needed to hear, and basically gave me a good needed slap in the face.**

**Thank you for the reviews people! they make my day! Please read the A/N at the beginning. And if you don't mind...vote on my poll. It does help!**

**Here is your song!**

**_Everybody look at me, me  
I walk in the door you start screaming  
Come on everybody whatchu here for?  
Move your body around like a nympho  
Everybody get your necks to crack around  
All you crazy people come on jump around  
I want to see you all on your knees, knees  
You either want to be with me, or be me._**

**Awsome song to dance to!! Very fun!**

**R&R!**

**-Avery**


	9. Fair Warning

**Yes, I know I hate these bitches too, but I am giving you a fair warning.**

**Okay people, bear with me here. I know I have not updated in forever, but there is an absolutly good reason that has nothing to do with laziness!!**

**So, you see, it started out with a simple good day in the sun, laying on the driveway waiting for loved one to come home. Then you get thirsty and you go inside for about 2 minutes. In those two minutes, your loved one just so happens to get home and into the driveway. Well, what did you leave on the driveway,...OH YEAH!! Your laptop!**

**Now I wish I would have figured it out 2 minutes sooner, but long story short, my laptop was out of order for a while. And now we have big bad Ike coming in so tha just makes it even shittier. So I will not be able to update for a bit, but I promise you as soon as my internet is working after this storm comes throgh, I will put out Chapter 8!**

**I don't mind if you reveiw to this, because I will not be deleting it. Expect a new chapter in...7 days!!**

**See you soon!! Hopefully...,**

**-Avery**


	10. Chapter 8

**Aye. So I am not going to give the excuse for school. I had time, I just kind of forgot about the story for a bit.**

**I would like to clear a couple things up by the way. A couple people were mad at Jasper. I totally understand. When I was in the hospital, and he was telling me that, I was kind of shocked. But then, when I had found out that him and his sister had gone through the same thing, and I found out that he was in Alice's position, I understood. They both felt the same betrayal from us. They both felt the same….secrecy and kind of hurt that we didn't tell them. So he was sticking up for Alice because he had felt her pain as well, so he knew.**

**Dedications!! The song was **

**_Maneater by Nelly Furtado_!! **

**Great dancing song! I have made a total fool of myself and friends when this song came on at a school dance.**

**_Miss.Megan, deborahj, UrEveryDayDork, LadyT02k, PattinsonGirl513, lol silly bella, CherryBlossoms016, KrisCullen, briiittx xhc, theoneandonlyher, heyyyamber!!_**

**Thank you for the awesome reviews and support!!**

**Anyway, Onward…!!**

* * *

I was shivering. I was freaking cold! You would figure that after getting out of the hospital, it would be the least of my worries, but no. I was doped up from pain medicine, and rolling in a wheelchair, so the only thing I had to complain about was the weather. So that was what I did.

"Bbuuuurrrrr…" I shivered dramatically, rubbing up and down my arms. Edward in all his glory looked over and rolled his eyes. He was used to it. The first couple times, he tried to remedy it, giving me his coat and turning the heater on like the concerned boyfriend he was. But after the tenth ten, he gave up.

I knew it was a small side effect of the meds they gave me, but I was going to complain! I thought back to what I had thought a minute ago. Boyfriend. That word sent shivers down my spine that had nothing to do with the cold I was feeling. Especially if it had Edward's name in the same sentence.

I leaned back into the soft leather of Edward's Volvo. Breathing in the sweet scent that coated the car, I settled into my thoughts. What would it be like meeting his parents? Were they nice? I mentally slapped myself. Of course they were nice. Who else could raise a guy like Edward?

I continued to ponder in my bottomless worry when a small chuckle broke me out of my train of thought. My head snapped up, shocked. Edward was trying to hide a laugh behind his fist. "What?" I asked, confused. "Bella, love. I have called your name about 6 times. You were just so wrapped up I guess you didn't hear me."

I blushed. If only he knew what I was thinking about…"What were you thinking so hard about that you didn't hear my 'smooth and silky voice'?" I sat there, shocked. "W- what are y- you talking ab- about?" I stuttered while matching the shade of a brick.

When did he hear that? Wait...why did I say that? He just about choked as he struggled to compose himself. "As you were staring off into space, you may have mentioned some things." As be barely got that sentence out because of his strained laugh, my face turned about the darkest shade of red.

He heard me? I looked out the window to try and shield my face. I hated my blush. It was annoying and so automatic that I couldn't stop it.

We rode in silence to his house. I leaned back and closed my eyes again. The meds that they gave me really knocked me out. I felt some sort of discomfort sort of lying in the distance. As if it was so faint, or it was going to get worse, but I didn't focus on it. I was trying to stay happy. Suddenly the car stopped. I jerked forward unexpectedly.

"We are here." Said my favorite silky voice. I opened my eyes after some effort and looked around. all I saw was trees until I looked at the obvious. My jaw dropped. There standing in front of me, was a three-story Victorian style mansion. I couldn't believe it. It was HUGE.

My mouth was still evidently catching flies, when Edward just had to ruin my moment. "Bella, we are here. You can stop gawking." Immediately I closed my mouth and started forward to the gigantic "humble abode." Edward reached out and grabbed my hand.

If I thought my heart was going fast at the sight at the house, I was clearly mistaken. I thought it was going to pump out of my chest when his cool, calming hand grabbed mine. I looked up. He was smiling down at me. His beautiful crooked grin smiling back at me. Together we walked up to the daunting house.

I admit it. I was scared as hell. What if they didn't like me? What if all they saw was some drugged up, underweight, whore? What if they saw the mask that I had on constantly, just to hide my pain. Edward saw through it, but what if they didn't?

Edward, always the gentleman. Opened the door. My jaw dropped once again. The interior was so much better than the outside.

There was a brilliant spiral staircase in the corner that made the house seem even more elegant if it was possible. The entire south side of the house was a glass wall. It opened up to a spectacular view. You could see the mountains and a small creek in the back.

The sun was just shining over the giant hill, so it lit up the room with a gold glow. In the other corner there was a beautiful baby grand piano. The space in front of me made it look like it was several rooms, but just opened up. I was in absolute awe. It was spectacular.

My dreaming was cut short when a small cough from the door the led to the kitchen made it's self-known. My eyes snapped over there. There standing was a beautiful women. She had caramel hair and light tan skin. She had a mature aurora to her. She couldn't be over the age of 25, but almost had a motherly glow.

"Welcome to our home Bella." She said. For a second I had to remind myself to breathe. This was Edward's mother. She was the one opinion I cared about the most. I have to get over my nerves before I look like a gaping fish.

"Um, thank you Mrs. Cullen. Your home is lovely." I responded politely. I was different. I was not used to this atmosphere. Her smile widened. "Thank you dear. And please call me Esme. Mrs. Cullen makes me feel old." She giggled. Edward's hand tightened in mine.

It calmed me instantly. I felt like a coiled spring ready to bounce. "Alright Esme. Thank you. Bella and I are going to go around the house. I will show her where she will be sleeping." I tensed again. I completely forgot about my living arrangements.

Immediately I felt guilty. I was such a burden. Edward slowly tugged me up the spiral staircase I was in awe of earlier. The house was simply beautiful. It was light and open. There was a simple lush gold carpet the covered the stairs and some of the first floor. The rest was covered in a honey wooden tile that blended beautifully.

I was practically stunned by the rest of the house. That was the best way to put it. Edward led me to the room I would be staying in. I opened the door and was amazed yet again. A king-size bed was in the middle. The structure was black wood. Around it was a black wood dresser, bookcase, and a large black desk. The walls were painted a royal blue and matched the room perfectly.

Slow tears welled in my eyes. They had done this all for me? My heart pinged. I couldn't remember he last time I had felt this generosity before. I don't think I ever had. I walked in slowly. It sounds weird, but the room had a certain smell. It smelled like home.

The tears started to fall now. I wrapped my hands around my torso to try and keep myself together. I had cried before, but this was the first time I was crying for my life. I had seen it fall down before my eyes, and didn't realize how good it could get. This was my new home.

Cool arms wrapped around over mine and brought me close to Edward's body. He laid his head on my shoulder and just let me let it out. Gently, he pulled me to the bed. Strong arms lifted me onto the bed and crawled in with me. I laid there, Edward's arms wrapped around me, my face in his chest, for I don't know how long. But it was long enough. The only thing running through my head was memories.

Memories of before my mother died. Before Charlie's weakness crushed him and took a hold of me. Then my thoughts switched to Edward. What the hell was I going to do? I was damaged goods. I couldn't do that to him. He deserved someone better. Someone who could be there for him, not have him saving the damsel in distress 24/7. I

t wasn't fair to him. He didn't deserve someone like me. He deserves someone that could match to him. His excellence, his kindness, and even his looks.

My sobs settled down after all the thoughts ran through my head. Cool lips pressed against my forehead and I settled back into Edward's arms. They tightened around me. I leaned back and rested my head on his neck. "Esme is calling us down for dinner Bella. Do you think you can handle it?" Even though his voice was soothing and soft, it startled me.

I took a deep breath in. "Yeah. I think so." I answered shakily. Edward nodded his head, his bronze curls falling over his eyes. I reached up, my hand shaking, and brushed them away. His deep eyes pierced mine. I melted. His eyes held nothing but love and concern. We were trapped in each other's eyes, and no rope could get us out.

Suddenly, a loud knock on the door interrupted out moment. "Come on Bella!! Get your ass out of there! It is time to eat and lord knows you need it!" I growled under my breath while Edward cursed. "Emmett" he mumbled at the same time. he looked at my put and started to laugh. I couldn't help but laugh with him.

Together, we walked down the stairs and to the dining room. It was very quiet as we headed in. the dining room looked spectacular. It had a long wooden table in its center that was filled with luscious food. My stomach growled just from seeing it. It had been a while since I had a large meal.

We all sat down at the chairs by the edge. There was an awkward silence as we filled our plates. "So Bella how is school?" Esme asked politely. "School is fine thanks. It is boring of course though." I laughed lightly trying to help the atmosphere.

Emmett launched on a huge discussion on the school's minor football player and it's chances this year. I was glad. I knew the topic was coming soon, I just wanted some time. I was so off in my thoughts that I jumped when Alice asked me a question. "So Bella…" she started cautiously. "Yes Alice?" I knew what she was going to ask, I just didn't want to say it. "When do you think we could go and collect our stuff from our old house?" she asked weakly.

Edward beside me, choked on his food as he glared viciously at Alice. "Alice do you think now is the time to discuss that?" he gritted through his teeth. She opened her mouth to speak, but I cut her off. "Alice I don't know really. We don't have a vehicle at the moment so I was thinking this weekend. If you all don't mind giving me a ride." I barely made the sentence out.

That part was the part I feared. Whether or not I would be able to go through my old house and come out whole. "Of course we don't mind Bella. Emmett could even help you move your stuff." Esme interjected politely.

Traitorous tears welled in my eyes again. They were too nice. "Thank you. I guess we would need a bit of help." Emmett pumped his fist in the air. "Hell yeah! Sounds like fun to me!" I laughed nervously. I was ready to get out of there. It was all too surreal.

"Love, are you ready to go?" Edward whispered in my ear. I shivered. Not at his voice but at his speech. _Love_. I loved it when he called me that. I nodded my head. "Can Bella and I be excused?" he asked politely. Esme nodded her head and Edward grabbed my hand.

He led me up the staircase again. Just outside of my room, was a basket of clothes. Alice. He stopped me and clasped our hands together. "Bella you need your rest." He said as his nimble fingers traced my baggy eyes. I nodded my head again, afraid to look up.

A small finger tucked under my chin and lifted my head up. My eyes met his. Slowly, he started to lean towards me. I met him half way and it was a battle of dominance. His tongue ran over my bottom lip begging for entrance. I eagerly gave it to him. His hands rested at my hips while I lifted mine to wrap around his neck.

His lips on mine were heaven. After all the stuff in my life, I felt like I was whole. He completed me. A loud cough from our right interrupted us.

I jumped from his arms and landed on my ass five feet from Edward. There stood Emmett and Alice with amused looks on their faces. "Ya know. If you wanted privacy, there is a door about a foot from you." Alice chuckled out. "And Eddie. Wow man. Didn't know you had it in you. You either Bella. Just next time go somewhere else to eat face. It was kind of sick." Emmett commented as they both ran up the stairs.

I couldn't help but laugh. Those two together were a handful. I took Edward's hand as he lifted me up. "Good night." He said as he walked back up the stairs, looking back for a second. I sighed and walked into my new room. On my bed was a pair of blue silky pajamas. Alice. I laughed and put them on.

Settling into my new and very comfortable bed, I shut off my mind. I had done enough thinking for this day. I snuggled into the blankets and pillows and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

_I was in my old house. This had to be a dream I thought. Everything is blurry. I walked up to the house, wondering why I was here. The door creaked open just like in those cheap horror movies. I walked in, going into the kitchen. There was a pot of boiling water on the stove. _

_I didn't remember putting that there. I walked out and into the living room. I froze. Charlie was sitting on the couch, beer bottle strewn around, watching a game. "Isabella!!" It yelled. I shrieked. I remembered this. "Get my dinner over here! I have been waiting long enough you whore!"_

_I sprinted to the kitchen. There was nothing there. I panicked. I knew what was going to happen. It was one of my worst experiences. I didn't want to relive it. There was nothing I could do. I heard It grunt as it got off the couch. It was coming here "Isabella! What the fuck did I say? I want my dinner!" I tried to run, but my feet were glued to the floor and my knees felt like they were locked in place. _

_It entered the kitchen. It's black and cruel eyes staring mine down. "You are in here you whore! Why are you not doing anything? I do everything for you! I gave you fucking life! I now know I should not have. It was a waste of a fucking screw. You are nothing you pathetic whore." It stomped forward and reached out to slap me. _

_I still couldn't move. The sting across my face hurt. Even in my dreams I could feel the pain. Its other hand came down and twisted my arm around my back. "Acknowledge me! I am talking to you. What? You think you are to good to talk to your father?" It screamed in my ear. _

_I knew not to say anything. It would only make it worse. He turned me and I froze. The pot of boiling water was on the stove. I struggled. I would not relive it. I couldn't. I knew it. It saw me struggling and looked ahead. The devilish gleam that forever held residence in his eyes jumped for joy. _

_It reached out for the pot. I couldn't let it happen. I kicked and scratched. I tried to bite. It would have stopped him in real life. But this was a dream. No a nightmare. I looked up, and felt the boiling water hit my skin as he poured it down my arms._

_I screamed, thrashing from the excruciating pain that went through me. I then felt something cold wrap around me. Someone was calling my name. Slowly, I drifted out._

* * *

"Bella!" I heard a velvet voice scream. I didn't respond. I wanted, no needed, to stop the burning. It was horrible. I screamed out, trying to get away from Charlie. I opened my eyes and didn't see the kitchen. I saw my bedroom wall. I stopped thrashing and broke down.

I couldn't handle this. Edward's arms wrapped around me again and he pulled me to his chest. I was still crying. I could still feel the water running down my body as it burned my flesh. Edward's comforting words ran through one ear and out the other.

I could barely see through my teared eyes, but I saw the outline of six other shapes standing by the bed. The whole Cullen family was in here watching me cry my eyes out.

Once I had a handle on my tears I looked up. Every single person's face held pity. Only Rosalie's held understanding. We locked eyes. She knew. Slowly, as if not to alarm me, she crawled onto the bed. I looked up at Edward. His eyes were blurry with tears. He spoke so quietly to his family that I could not hear them. With a backward pity glance, one by one they filed out of the room.

Rose stayed and wrapped her arms around mine. I flinched back. My skin still felt like it was smoldering. Looking into my eyes, she lifted up my sleeve. Her eyes widened as she took in the faded burn blisters. I had not been able to go to the hospital. It was a year ago, but the spots were still there.

They ran down both of my arms and chest. Edward returned and jumped onto the bed. Together, Rosalie, Edward, and me fell into a sleep together, wrapped in each other's arms.

* * *

**Okay. Thank you for those of you that mourn my laptop. It was a great loss for me. Anyway... I got it out in a week! it was hard. The ending was awkward for me to write. That was how we slept, but I dont know how to write it.**

**That was a while whopping 3481 words! Yes I know.**

**The song for this one is...**

**_They'll go and ask the DJ  
Find out just what would she say  
If they all tried coming on to her  
Don't they know it's never going to work  
They think they'll get inside her  
With every drink they buy her  
As they all try coming on to her  
This time somebody's getting hurt_**

**Great song!**

**Please R&R! I don't know when I am going to be able to update again!**

**-Avery**


	11. Chapter 9

OKay so only posting this because fan fiction is acting weird and the next chapter is hopefully an update if it loads it right.


	12. CHapter 10

**Yes, I know bow down to me. I have updated just before forever!! I know I know… I have a story at the bottom!**

**Anyway, thank you for the reviews! They so make my day! Here are the dedications!!**

**The song was **

**_Next Contestant by Nickelback!_ **

**Awesome song!**

**And…. I was surprised with the amount of people who got it right.**

**_Deborahj and karleigh007!!!!_**

**Anyway, onward!!!…..**

* * *

"Alice? How often does this happen?" I heard a silky smooth voice. Ask. The voice sounded anxious. I frowned. A voice like that should never be in peril.

"I don't know Edward. She usually never slept. She was always afraid of Charlie" a high pitched voice responded. I head a small sigh. Suddenly, something rubbed my arm. "Bella…Bella" the smooth voice whispered. At the mention of my name, I slowly began to drift up.

It felt like a blindfold uncovered my eyes. I saw clearly Edward and Alice standing at the foot of my bed. The image seemed familiar. Edward leaned forward, his bright eyes shining with nothing but concern. "Bella, are you all right?" he asked. I swore I had heard him ask something like that earlier.

Catching my breath, I nodded weakly. He signed with relief and fell back. I looked to Alice. Her usual chirpy demeanor was shadowed by me. As usual. And as usual, I felt guilty. I moved to get out of bed, and instantly cramped up. My stomach felt like it was on fire. Edward rushed forward, stabling me. "I think it would be better if you stayed in bed for a while, Bella. You need your rest" I laid back.

Nodding. I was not in the mood to fight nor talk. I felt mentally and physically exhausted. Edward and Alice gave each other pointed looks. It looked suspicious, but I was going to let it pass. I was too tired to argue. After another weird look, Alice left the room, slamming the door behind her. I jumped at the sound.

I looked to Edward. He looked…anxious was a good word for it. He slowly moved toward me, reaching his hand out as if to comfort me.

Flashbacks from my dream flooding back to me.

_Charlie reaching for the pan, slowly advancing._

I flinched back, yelping as I did so. He looked nothing like the horrible monster that had harmed me, but I couldn't explain it Edward jerked back, looking hurt. Neither of us spoke. He backed away silently and slow, as if not to hurt me. I was hurt. I was mad. But all of this was that myself. I was already driving away the people that might just care for me.

Hot salty tears were running down my face. I couldn't keep them back. Sobs ripped from my chest for the third time that day. But for once, cold arms did not comfort me. Instead, I heard the door close quietly, and small footsteps walk away. That did nothing for me. Absolutely nothing. It just made me cry harder.

My mind was so confusing. Fresh memories running through my mind.

_Edward holding me, Charlie holding me. Edward wiping my tears, Charlie causing them._

They were the exact opposite, but yet I was scared of both of them. I shook my head trying to dispel the images running through. I sat there, with my knees pulled to my chest, crying my eyes out trying to make sense of things for what seemed like forever, until a quite knock rang through my room.

"Can I come in" a small voice asked. Alice. I let out a small squeak of confirmation. The door creaked open and in walked Alice. She looked horrible. I didn't even know how I looked, but I hope it isn't as bad as her. Her hair was in a bundle around her head, creating a black haystack. Makeup and mascara ran down her face in black rivers. Her eyes were puffy red from crying and her clothes were mussed.

She looked down as she walked in, almost as if ashamed. Se lowered herself onto my bed and laid back, waiting for a response from me. "What do you need Alice?" I choked out, flinching when it sounded impolite. She sighed, moving up to look me straight in the eye. "What did you do to Edward? What was your dream about? Why are you still hurting? _Why can't you tell anyone about it_?" she started out slowly, but got louder and more forceful as she continued to talk.

I jumped back, bot expecting that from her. She was my sister. She was supposed to understand. Even though she didn't feel anything, she was supposed to back me up. Anger flew through me. "Why do you need to know? Are you that nosy?" I almost screamed.

I couldn't justify my anger at her; I just wanted a release. She flinched back at me, looking hurt. But I continued. "It does not matter what my dream is about. Why the hell do you think I am still hurting? If anything like this would have happened to you, would you be up and jumping around singing 'Happy Day'?"

My hands started to move with my works, motioning my anger. Adrenaline pumped through me, fueling my hurtful words. "You want to know I can't tell anyone?" I yelled at her frightened face. She nodded weakly, looking down with more tears rolling down her face, ruining her makeup even more.

"I will tell you why! Because all I do is a hurt people! What am I doing to you now? I am hurting you! What did I do to Charlie? I hurt him! Mom's death was my fault, and you know damn well it was don't even deny it!" she opened her mouth to protest, but I cut her off. I was past stopping point.

"Don't even Mary Alice Swan! I sent her out with my selfish needs. Because of me, we don't have a mother. Because of me, we are without someone to guide us through the weird and complicated steps of womanhood. All because of me. What would happen if I let my true feelings show? I have hurt you enough. Hell I even hurt Edward this morning."

My stomach clenched as I thought back to the pain in his eyes as I jerked back, seeing the monster and not the angel in front of me. "I hurt him. I hurt the angel that helped me, that held me at night when I remembered the evil cretin that scarred me. I can't see the beauty of him Alice. I don't know what the hell to do. All I see when he reaches for me is someone who used to love me. Who used to shower me with affection and love. And that I took it for granted and didn't realize it could be gone in an instant as soon as I made a selfish ad stupid decision again." I stopped my rant to take a breath, remembering that Alice was still here, hearing me spill my secrets that had only held my mind for less than 72 hours, but was the epitome of my thoughts.

My breathing was hard and ragged. I couldn't even bring myself to look at Alice. I know what I would find would be denial. Denial that I could do such horrible things I dropped to my knees, expecting her to leave so that I could wallow in my self-hatred in peace. Or as peaceful as it could get. But that wasn't it. How could I ever think that about Alice?

I felt skinny arms wrap around my waist, and pull me up to the bed. Even in my state I was surprised of her strength. Her gentle hands lifted my head and wiped my tears away. I was embarrassed. You would figure I would be past that part, but I was truly embarrassed. Here I was, crying my eyes out. As my little sister took care of me. I had just admitted to most of my fears, and she still wanted to comfort me, even when I had hurt her.

"Bella." She uttered softly. "Belly" she said again. I couldn't help but crack a small smile as she said my child-hood nickname. "Belly listen to me please." I finally got the courage to look up. I didn't find denial like I wanted. At least that would make me feel better; knowing that someone else hated me. What I saw was not pity, but understanding.

And for some reason, that pissed me off. What was with my mood swings? She took my hands and laid them in her lap. "Belly I want you to listen to me. I want you to listen to me well." She stopped sharply. Catching her breath and choking back tears, she managed to get out simple words. "It is not your fault." I started to jump up, to stop her from continuing her lie, when she cut me off, sending me a look that would stop a bull in its tracks.

"Do not make me use your full name like you did mine Isabella Marie Swan!" I stopped short, stunned by the firmness in her eyes. "It is not your fault. What do you think Edward and I are trying to explain to you! Nothing excused him from that! Nothing excuses him from anything in anyway shape or form. Mom's death was not your fault. None of this was! And if you want to stop hurting people, then maybe you should accept this fact. I am hurt by the fact that you still blame yourself. That shows me that I have not been trying hard enough to get you to accept yourself." She stopped and lifted my chin that had drifted down as shame.

"And I swear if you don't stop this self-hatred, I might have to get someone for you." With that said, she got up, and left the room in that proud stride of hers. I sat there in shock, trying to analyze what she had just pounded into my brain.

Was I hurting people by not believing in myself? No that can't be right. I didn't want to hurt other people. That was my main focus. I had had enough of people hurting me; I didn't want to continue the pattern. I knew I had hurt Edward. And that was what pierced my heart the most. The look of pain on his face when I recoiled.

But how was I supposed to overcome that. I didn't know what to do. Everytime he reached for me, or looked at me now, all I saw was Charlie with black eyes and evil intentions. Alice would probably be glad to help me, but I needed someone who could actually relate to me. Someone, who maybe had had second doubts with men, but kept going strong anyway.

Someone like Rosalie. She could help me.

* * *

**Okay, so not really a cliffy. We all knew it was going to happen sooner or later!**

**So my reason for not updating....ready for it...I am grounded!**

**I personally do not know how a 18 year-old can get grounded by STEP PARENTS, but it happend. So I am even not supposed to be on at the moment, but screw them.**

**This chapter is a bit shorter than my usual. I try and keep it past 3.000, but I fell up shot with this one. This is only 2,300 words. **

**So to make up for my furture absences as well, I will give yall something. In a review or PM, I will let you add an insert. Like something you want to happen. **

**My story is about done. It gets boring from here on out, and not really a good book. So, with yall's info, I can make it go farther. So, just review or PM me an idea, and I will get it in!**

**Your song for this chapter....**

_**This time, I wonder what it feels like  
To find the one in this life, the one we all dream of  
But dreams just aren't enough  
So I'll be waiting for the real thing, I'll know it by the feeling  
The moment when we're meeting, will play out like a scene  
Straight off the silver screen  
So I'll be holding my own breath, right up 'til the end  
Until that moment when, I find the one that I'll spend forever with**_

**So please R&R!**

**-Avery**


	13. Chapter 11

**Aight yall long time no write. I have several reasons, two broken fingers, that by the way make it very hard to type. And the other would be next grounding, which is a result of my broken fingers, and my broken fingers because I punched a guy that grabbed my "assets" inappropriately. I don't deal with that well if you can't tell.**

**Anyway… The song was Gotta be Somebody by Nickelback. One of my personal faves. And the dedication goes to…**

**briiittx xhc, karleigh007, KrisCullen, Jasper Hale Fan, and even though they did not g****uess the song, they gave very inspiring reviews, Unerose93, and dvorndran!!!**

**Anyway…Onward…**

* * *

I crept down the hall as silently as I could. A full day had passed since I had hurt Edward like I did. The guilt just kept creeping into my soul. Until I apologized, and knew he forgave me that guilt would still be there, eating at my insides. The ivory door was just mocking me. Daring me to knock, but at the same time scaring me away with the possibilities of what I would give inside.

Right as my hand went to sell my soul away on the door, the door opened, and there stood Rosalie in all her glory. "I heard you out there for the last 10 minutes." She said with a smirk. I stood there, dumbfounded. "You can come in you now that right" I snapped to attention. This was what I was here for. To talk. To converse in the ways that only we could do. "Rig- Right. Yeah thanks." I stuttered as I walked in slowly, taking in the room in awe.

Like the rest of the house, it was classy, but with a hint of personality. And in this case, Rosalie's personality. It has small posters of designs around the room, with a large a bed, not pink, but a nice purple and gold. It was beautiful. A small cough from behind alerted me back to where I was. Oh yeah.

I whipped around to see Rose standing at the door with that same smirk on her face. "Enjoying the view?" she asked as she moved towards the bed. I nodded slightly. Taking a deep breath, trying to calm myself, "I need to talk to you." I blurted out, recognizing the pleading tone in my voice. Rosalie looked out her window. It faced Esme's gardens, and a small view of the river.

She sighed, and without conviction, simply stated "You pushed Edward away didn't you." I was taken back. How did she know? She took my confusion as a cue to speak. "Edward has been moping around the house all day, and you obviously need to speak to me, so what else could it be?" A sharp breath escaped me. He was in more pain? A firm hand wrapped around mine.

It was Rose's judging by the perfect manicure. "Don't worry. I will try and help you. I know how you feel." She spoke softly. I looked into her deep blue eyes. I could see the ghosts of her past. But I could also see that she had overcome them. I didn't know where to start. Everything was so confusing. But Rosalie took care of that for me.

"When I first met Emmett, it was here in this household. I was already so afraid of everything. Even Carlisle scared me, and I didn't even think that was possible for him to scare anyone." I nodded. Carlisle was so comforting. I didn't even flinch away from him. "But Emmett was different from any man I knew. He took his time. He was more patient then I ever thought possible. It took months for me to be comfortable with any guy hugging me, with the exception of Jasper, but when I finally wanted the physical comfort, Emmett was slow and careful. Every move he made around me was measured."

I couldn't imagine Emmett, the no personal space bear, being careful. Even when he first met me, he smothered me in back-breaking hugs. Then I thought of Edward. He wasn't as careful as Rose described, hell we had already been French kissing, but he was very personal. He didn't let me out of his sight. He acted as though he would die for me, and we had known each other for less than a week. Rose quickly shut off my train of thought with her next comment.

"Are you afraid of him" she asked abruptly. She pulled me up short, pulled the carpet from under my feet. That was the daunting question. Was I? I knew the obvious answer was yes, but I didn't know for sure. "I don't know." I answered quietly. Rose studied my expression. "Bella, Alice told me how your mother died." I flinched. "I want you to know that I am real sorry." I could hear the Texas leaking out of her. But what my main focus was would be what come out next.

"You and I both know it is not your fault. And don't you dare try and interrupt me." She stopped me. "When my mother died, I thought the same exact thing. That it was my entire fault. That I was to blame, and everything that Royce was giving me, I deserved." She said this full of emotion, while her eyes studied my reaction. I tried to keep my face emotionless, but it was hard. "It wasn't my fault either. And it took Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, and Jasper's efforts to pound it into my head. But I was scared of being close to someone. Because before I realized that it wasn't my fault. I was afraid of losing anyone else I loved." She stopped short, and took a shuddering breath.

"And now look where I am. I am surrounded by people who love me. People I know who would never leave me behind and are paitent with everything I do." A proud glint shone in her eye. I mixed our situations. "When I see Edward, I see Charlie behind him." I spat it out. I was tired of holding that burden. Rose's eyes were filled with understanding. She urged me to go on. I took a deep breath and continued.

"I see someone who used to love me, who used to play with me, and take care of me. I guess that is why I am scared. I'm not scared of _Edward_, I am scared of who my subconscious thinks he will become." I was speaking my mind. It started to make sense.

"That's why when he shows affection, you freak, because Charlie used to that, and he turned into a monster." Rosalie spoke softly, confirming my suspicions. I nodded. As much as it filled me with relief to know that I wasn't scared of Edward, It also saddened me. Even with him gone, his aftermath was still here. How long was it going to take me to get over this? "Rose," I started off. Her head snapped up. "How long did it take for you accept men? It was a simple question, but it held so many answers.

Sighing, she answered, "I am not going to lie Bella, it took me a long time. For every man that touched me, all I saw was Royce's face in their place, punching me and hurting me. Even now I have nightmares about him. As much as I have grown from this experience, I still have those reserves." A crooked grin started on her face. "But Emmett helps me through those. He is patient, and knows when I need some time to myself." She trailed off, obviously remembering time with Emmett. I thought. I seemed to be doing that a lot. Could I keep up with Edward? I didn't know how long it was going to take me, but I was sure as hell going to try.

* * *

Rose and I walked out of her room, hand in hand and a grin on our faces. We had talked…a lot. She helped me understand pretty much everything I was feeling. Now I just had to out into action. To say that I felt better after talking with Rose was a huge understatement. I felt like I owed my life to her.

We walked into the kitchen, where everyone was sitting. Emmett and Edward were talking off in a corner, as Alice and Rose's parents talked about living arrangements. I barely caught the end of the conversation before they stopped. "So, because you all are foster parents, we could continue living here, even now, before you make it official?" Alice asked with Jasper holding her hand. They were just so cute together. Esme nodded and continued. "Of course. We have enough room here for you and Bella to have separate rooms, and we probably won't be moving again until you kids finish out high school. Unless..." Esme lowered her voice, "Unless Bella wants to leave. We would pack up for her if she feels uncomfortable in this town."

Tears stung in the back of my eyes as I almost choked on a lump in my throat. They would pick up and leave for me? I had never felt that compassion before, it was enlightening. Rose leaned down. "I told you. They are going to be infinity patient with you. They were with me. They left Houston for me." I swallowed the lump in my throat. I looked at Edward and Emmett again. Emmett seemed like he was the one doing the talking. Edward kept looking down at his shoe nervously, nodding his head at what ever Emmett was telling him.

Trying not to think about what they might be talking about, I walked forward, putting my brave face on. "Hello all!" I practically shouted. I strode forward confidently and opened the fridge, looking for something to eat. When I found some yogurt, I turned back around and was met with six shocked faces, and one beautiful smirk coming from Rosalie. "What?" I questioned. I could understand the confusion, because confident was the exact opposite of how I had been, but no need to keep at it.

"You all look like you've seen a ghost. Wow." I chuckled darkly. Alice was the first to snap back. She came up to me and hugged me while a metal spoon was in my mouth. "I'm glad you are back." She whispered in my ear. For the second time, I choked back tears. I was never going to forgive myself for the pain I have caused her, but at least she forgave me.

Esme and Carlisle came back next, each grinning to themselves before they left the room. Next was Emmett, who came up behind me and gave me a careful hug. "Hey, be careful please. Don't choke on that spoon; I don't think Eddie would like it too much." I could see the careful Emmett that Rose described. The gentle, but still himself boy that could have you splitting your sides laughin one second, and the next feeling his warmth as he made you feel as good as you can get.

I laughed as he released me, taking the spoon out of my mouth as they left with Jasper, who gave me a smile and a nod, leaving me with Edward. I stood there for a second, not being able to look him in the eyes. I still couldn't forgive myself for even thinking of this beautiful creature as the one who hurt me, but I was going to try and make it up to him.

A soft finger tilted my chin up. All I saw was beautiful green orbs. "Hey," he spoke softly. I took a shuddering breath. "Hey," I answered weakly. He looked down at his shoes, bouncing on one foot as if he was nervous. "Do you want to go for a walk with me?" he asked quietly. My head snapped up, almost hitting him. That was the last thing I thought was going to come out of his mouth. "Um, sure…" I trailed off nervously. I didn't know where this was going, but I was going to follow it there. He grabbed my hand softly, and pulled me out the back door, and into the beautiful woods.

"We need to talk some." He stated looking out at the river.

* * *

**Eh. Not the worst cliffie I have ever seen. But it will work. Okay, so this chapter took me forever to type! All 2562 words of it! These splints keep getting in the way! But it was worth it...te hee.**

**So I have 3 bonus songs for you. If you guess the first one, you get the dedication. If you guess the second one, well then you rock. If you guess the third one, you get to pick a extra scene for me to write in my extras story, that will come out after I finish this one. So get to guessing! And for the record, some more ideas for this story is always nice! I have had a couple that I will add in here, but some more would be nice!**

**Song #1!**

**_When I see your smile  
Tears run down my face I can't replace  
And now that I'm strong I have figured out  
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul  
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one_**

**Song #2!**

**_Black dress with the tights underneath,  
I got the breath of the last cigarette on my teeth,  
And shes an actress (actress),  
But she ain't got no need.  
Shes got money from her parents in a trust fund back east.  
T-t-t-tongues always pressed to your cheeks,  
While my tongue is on the inside of some other girls teeth,  
T-tell your boyfriend if he says hes got beef,  
That I'm a vegetarian and I ain't fucking scared of him.  
_**

**Very Last Bonus Song!! #3!**

**_Just hear me out  
If it's not perfect I'll perfect it till my heart explodes  
I highly doubt  
I can make it through another of your episodes  
Lashing out  
One of the petty moves you pull before you lose control_  
**

**R&R Please!**

**-Avery**


	14. Chapter 12

**Aight so sup yall? Yeah…three months…well oops. I am going to get another chapter out this week to make up for that! Whew!!! 20 reviews! I love yall! And actually a lot of people got the songs right! I was surprised! Here they are!**

**Dedications go to…**

**, XEdwardXxXLoverX, coldbuthot, lol silly bella,, Hse Hissie, ibetagainstalice, Jay-xoxo!!!! Thank yall! **

**The song was Your Guardian Angel by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus!**

**The Third song meant you also got to pick a scene to go in the extras story, and the people who got them, didn't give me one! So if you got the third song, which was Get Stoned by Hinder, send me a review!**

**Anyway…Onward!!...**

* * *

My breath sucked in. this was the part I was dreading. The one where he told me I was useless. Used, broken, a piece of trash that should be crumpled up on the side of the road. But I knew better. Even after knowing him for less than a week, I knew he was too good for that. He could never hurt anyone like that, and almost kicked myself for even thinking that. But instead, I waited like a coward for him to make the first move.

He looked out into the forest, looking deep in thought. "Did I hurt you that bad?" It came out so soft it could be the wind, and for a second I almost doubted he had said it, but I couldn't mistake the musical chime to it. My head almost hurt from the whiplash as I snapped my head up. What on this green Earth was he talking about? I stared at him, shocked. He looked down at me piercing me with his green orbs. "Did I?" He repeated.

A small squeak came out of my mouth. I couldn't believe him. "What are you talking about?" I almost screamed at him if it wasn't for the fact that my throat seemed to still be in shock. "What do you mean 'what am I talking about?' you know. The other morning. I made you cry. I made you scream. What did I do that hurt you so bad?" If I could've, I might have burst out into a long lecture on reading body language, but something in me didn't let me.

"You didn't hurt me Edward." I barely made it out. I could not wrap my mind around his logic. It was all me. I was the one that hurt him. He whipped around, and it almost looked like he was about to cry. His eyes were shiny with new moisture. My mouth seemed to get the best of me. "Why are you talking like this? It wasn't you Edward. You could never hurt me like that. I have learned to trust you in this past week, and that's new for me. But no. it wasn't you. It was my stupid mind." I looked down and sighed. How the hell could he think it was him? "Edward…" I trailed off, not wanting to say what I needed to. "I'm scared…" It barely eked out.

His head snapped up, almost hitting mine. His hand took a grip of my chin, lifting me until I looked in his eyes. "Why?" he whispered so softly that I could barely hear him. "Not of you…of my reactions. I'm going to need to take it slow. I don't know how my past actions have not been doing this to me. But when you leaned towards me today…" I stopped. I knew by saying this he would think the worst, but I knew I needed to say it. "When you leaned towards me, I saw Charlie, not you." He flinched, obviously affected by my words. I knew it.

I started out with more conviction. "I can't do some of the stuff. The kissing, the hugging…I need to put it on hold. Right now, when I make contact, it becomes a flashback of the past." I looked down at my thong covered feet. I was ashamed. No matter how many times I repeated it in my head, that I needed to say it, I just saw the troubled green orbs, surrounding my words. He took a step back and simply looked at me. "Then what can I do?" He asked. I was about to answer, but stopped myself. How the hell was I supposed to know? I thought back to it."Just…be there for me. Like you have been. I talked to Rose. Be my Emmett. I can't promise you a relationship, and I can barely say a friendship, but I need time to heal. Trust has been broken for me. One of my loved ones hurt me, and kept hurting me. It doesn't matter who you are, but my heart says everyone else will do it too. I need to prove it wrong. And until I can do that, I'm just not open."

I think it took a bit for my words to sink in. His eyes glazed over, processing what I had said. I looked out toward the forest, hoping it would give me a sense of serenity. I saw a bushy squirrel running up a tree, saw birds flying from the tops for no apparent reason. But my favorite of all, was the sway of the trees in the wind. It showed their strong purpose. I small sigh snapped me out of my thinking. Edward was leaning against a tree, his strong arms folded on his chest, and staring at me.

His gaze my me squirm. He looked at me like I was the only thing in the world. Or at least that was my imagination. I almost melted under his gaze. It was so intense. "Do you think I could hold you?" he asked quietly and patiently, like he was talking to a small child. "Yes." I automatically spit out. He walked slowly towards me, like advancing a large predator, and wrapped his arms around me. I leaned into his embrace. He smelled of something no one could copy. It was sweet and spicy, but pure and smooth. It was Edward.

We stood like that, just simply holding each other for what felt like eternity. Eventually we gravitated to the ground. There was a soft patch of grass perfectly shaped, and we layed there. He gave me space, something I was thankful for. But always some part of us was touching. It could be our hands, feet, or even or heads as we starred at the sky, trying to make shapes out of the clouds. We talked. Nothing too deep, Just simple material things. What kind of movies we liked, music, what we thought of the new celebrity couple, and Chris Brown's major offense.

Just light things. We moved to school. I couldn't stop my laughter as Edward described Lauren's flirting when I was gone, and when he tried to act it out, mocking her voice and trying to sway his hips I could barely breathe I was laughing so hard. We didn't notice as the sky slowly got darker and the animals quieter. But what did alert us, was the cold gust of wind that swept through on instinct, I jumped into Edward's arms. His warmth spread through me, and I relaxed into his arms.

I was comfortable. No flashbacks, no horrible tingling sensations, just a fire that spread through me, and warmed my heart. We laid there, with me in his arms, and said nothing. We didn't need to. Our actions spoke for themselves. "Do you want to go back love?" I nodded, as we stood up, and brushed off the invisible grass. "Yeah. They are probably looking for us." For once my voice sounded strong, and not totally parched. Hand in hand we walked through the path. Luck was on our side. It was getting dark, but we could still see the way. As we broke through the barrier of the trees, we saw the lights of the house. Everyone was there.

We walked through the back door, and a black little torpedo almost knocked us back. "_OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG! Youtwoarefinallytogether! IttookyoulongenoughbutIguessyoufinallydidit! Don'tyouevermakeuswaitthatlongagain! Youhavenoideahowscaredwewere! Notbecauseyoutwodidn'tcomehome, butwethoughtyoumightneveractuallyseeeachother_! My head spun, but I got the jist of it. Edward however, didn't. He looked like he had just seen a monkey jump out of a TV. I leaned over and whispered in his ear. "Basically she is happy we are together." A grin lit his face, and he hugged me with one arm. "I am too." And he kissed the top of my forehead.

* * *

**Not as long as my usual chapters, but it will do. What did you think? I liked it personally, but it is your job to tell me! So pretty please review! I will update this week by the way! The parental unit is at work, and I am in SPRING BREAK! So WHOOOO! Anyway... Here are your songs!**

**_Hate your mind, regrets are better left unspoken.  
For all we know this void will grow,  
And everything's in vain, distressing you don't leave me open,  
Feels so right that I'll end this all before it gets me._**

**Review!!!**

**-Avery**


	15. Chapter 13

**Aight yall! I got a total of 4 reviews for the last chapter. I am thankful that I got some...but c'mon guys! I know I don't update often, but I still really wpuld appreciate more! WARNING! A very very mature theme starts and ends with the italics. I would advise readers with weak stomachs to skip that part.**

**Anyway...Onward!!**

* * *

It had been three weeks since we went to the forest and had our fateful talk. Things between me and Edward had never been better. We had our ups and downs, but they were expected. It did scare me sometimes when Edward would try and surprise me, and hug me from behind, but some talking always got me calmed down. But the one thing we had not done was kiss. And I was very glad. Edward wasn't pushing me for anything, like he promised, not that I expected anything less, but we had simply hugged. And for now that was good enough. I didn't think I was ready for anything more, and Edward respected that.

We were all sitting by the fireplace, watching the flames lick the charred logs when Alice suddenly made her presence known. "I know!" I jumped back into Edward, who I was sitting by, almost being scared to death. Emmett was rubbing his ears and Rose was simply rolling her eyes. "Damn Alice…did you have to scream?" he whined like a six year old. Jasper, whose lap Alice was sitting on, answered for her. "Oh get over it Emmett. I am used to it." As he winked at Alice. She blushed and dropped her head. I couldn't help but think about their relationship. Watching them interact was truly something aw over. They were so cute together, and Jasper's calm and cool personality with Alice's hyperactive and crazy persona mixed into the perfect couple. They complimented each other beautifully.

I looked away from them, and out of the corner of my eyes, felt Edward's gaze on me. I turned, and sure enough he was there. He wrapped me tighter, and kissed my forehead, making me melt into his arms. We laid there until Emmett's booming voice snapped us out of our trance. "So Alice, what was your need to scream across the room at us?" he taunted. "Oh I just thought of something to pass the time instead of just staring at this boring old fire." "Psh…what? Something like truth-or-dare?" I couldn't help but blurt out. She turned her evil glare on me.

"That was exactly what I was thinking. And you had better not have a problem with that." she threatened menacingly. I stuttered "Not not at all." I cowered back into Edward's arms, hoping to find comfort. This was going to be one hell of a night.

I laid with Edward after the whole ordeal. I swear I was scared from watching Emmett French kiss Alice. And almost split my sides watching her slap him silly after the whole thing was done. Edward's arms were wrapped around me, holding me safe in his comfort. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep, thinking only of Alice's bright red face and Emmett's fear when Alice got that glint in her eye.

_I was lying down, thinking about what had happened earlier. Charlie had ripped my skin open with his vicious kick to my chest. I had a large gash across my stomach, and it was so sore it hurt to even stand up. All of a sudden my door was kicked open and it banged against the wall. Charlie stood there, with only horror in his stare. "What do you think you are doing?" He screamed... I shrank back, knowing Alice was only a couple doors down and if I reacted, he was surly make things worse. _

_I __remembered this…but the next part wasn't right. He saw me, only in my pajamas and licked his lips. And suddenly I knew where this was going. He stalked forward, like a predator to his prey. His eyes roamed my body, stopping at my curves, and ran back up to my face. He reached my bed, and took off his shirt, throwing it to the corner of the room. I started to get up to run. This wasn't right. It didn't end like this, but my imagination had different ideas. "Stay back down!" he screamed at me. _

_I did as he said, fearing my punishment. His vein in his forehead looked like it would combust at any given moment. He reached for my top, and I stayed still, squeezing my eyes shut to try and block him out. He slowly pulled it down, staring at my bra that clad my chest . He licked his lips again, making a horrible slurping sound. "They are just like your mothers." He said to himself and me and the same time. "Take it off." He demanded. I shook my head. I wouldn't do it for him. "Take it off or I will do it myself!" he screamed in my face, inches from my lips. _

_I shook my head again. He lunged forward, grabbing the straps and pulled hard. The flimsy material ripped, and the cloth fell from my chest. He stared at my breasts, and backed away. He unbuckled his pants, taking off his belt, and looked at me to do the same. I was frozen. Not in my dreams, I didn't want to repeat this experience. Give me the burning water, the knife that cut through my skin, or even the car hitting me on my way home from school. Anything but this. I might just lose my innocence in my dreams. I knew not technically that was true, but to me it was. _

_He started to run his hands down my sides, and down my legs. I held back the shiver I remembered from this. I couldn't go through this again. I barely made it last time, and I couldn't escape this dream. He grabbed at my breasts, it was painful and I let out a cry. He squeezed them hard, moaning as he did so. _

_Bile rose in my throat. A sharp sting went across my face. I couldn't help it but to cower back and cover my chest. He lept forward, grabbed my hips and pulled me back. His grip was so hard, it broke skin. Blood started to run down my hips, but he seemed to follow it. He ripped off my pajama pants, throwing them to the side of my room, where his clothes were. I dared to look at his face, and when I did, I knew I shouldn't have. his eyes were only filled with lust and hate, and I knew it was the end. I tried to zone out, but it didn't work. I could feel his hands running down my sides, grabbing at my tender breasts and squeezing roughly. _

_I could feel his arousal press into my stomach through his black boxers. I could feel him travel down to the apex of my legs, and plunge his fingers into my, making me scream at the sudden pain. I could feel when he positioned himself above me, and had his hands on the headboard. I could feel my dry throat scratch when I screamed for help._

I could feel soft arms around me, trying to hold me down_. _

_I could feel Charlie's hot breath at my ear, whispering things that not even a lover would say, sick and grotesque things that would send shivers down the most corrupt minds._

I could hear someone yelling my name, trying to get me to my senses_. _

_I could taste the alcohol and sweat that ran into my mouth when he shoved his tongue into my mouth, and make my gasp for air as he held my throat. I could hear the slight rustling of the fabric as he ripped away his boxers, and a slight moan as he stroked himself. I could see Charlie take in a deep breath, and thrust his hips forward._

Soft arms were wrapped around me as I jolted forward, screaming my lungs out until they cracked. I thrashed around, trying to rid myself of the prison of arms that was going to hurt me. I had to get out. I couldn't let that happen again. But then I heard it. "Bella! Bella! Calm down! It is me!" A soft velvety voice rang out. I couldn't help it, I still needed to get out. "Edward! Let go of her!" A familiar voice yelled. I knew both of these, but I couldn't put my finger on the owner.

Suddenly the arms released me, and I fell forward, crashing into a mound of sheets. I could still feel his breath misting onto my face, and his horrid hands running down my body and violating me in the most worst way. Tears were coming down my face like oceans crashing into the shores. I felt every injury he ever inflicted on me, and my body was on fire.

I tried to put it out, rubbing over every bruise and broken bone, but it just made it worse. Suddenly, a soft voice was next to me, talking softly. "Bella, he isn't here. Please calm down. You are fine." It was Rosalie. My brain registered the caring and softness of her voice. I almost stopped. Reality hit me. I wasn't in my old bedroom, I was in Edward's. He wasn't trying to hurt me. he was gone. Locked up. For forever. I was overreacting. I opened my eyes, and Edward was across the room, staring at me with light tears welling up in his eyes.

Rosalie was beside me, holding a glass of water and a box of tissues. I pulled my legs up to my knees, and continued to cry. I couldn't help or stop the salty liquid running down my wet cheeks. "Can I?" I heard Rosalie ask. I looked beside me and if it wasn't for her hair, I would have never known it was her. She was holding her arms out, as if to hug me. I nodded. She slowly crept toward me on her knees, and wrapped her thin arms around my shoulders. I leaned into them, as a soft pillow.

Right now she held me together, kept me from falling apart and I was never more thankful. I couldn't get his face out of my mind. Every way I moved, something popped up that made me scream, that held back my demons that I worked so hard to release. Finally I broke and flung myself at Rose, as if she were my life preserver. My tears were ruing her shirt, but I didn't care, and I knew she understood. I don't know how long I cried, but it wasn't enough. Slowly, the tears started to ease, and my throat burned from the screaming, but I still stayed in Rose's embrace. She held me for softly, rocking me back and forth, trying to comfort me.

A small cough interrupted us, and I remembered we were not alone. I looked toward Edward's corner. He looked terrified. My heart panged. He heard everything... When he saw that I made eye contact, he tried to smile, but it didn't work. I felt horrible. I motioned for him to come over. I was missing something. Rose was one of the best people I could have, but Edward offered more than comfort. He offered love. "Are you sure?" Rose asked me quietly, thought we both knew he could hear us. I nodded.

Edward looked at Rose for confirmation, and reluctantly she signaled him over as well. He walked slowly, as if he was approaching a small frightened kitten, which greatly resembled me at the moment. He knelt down, and lightly wiped the salty substance from my face. He didn't say anything, but his face did all the talking. he was frightened he might set me off, but I knew he wouldn't. Edward resembled nothing of the monster in my realistic dream. I saw him as my angel, along with Rose, and someone to help me out and guide me to the right place.

Together we sat, me crying sometimes, trying to get it all out, and them, comforting and keeping me sane with their actions. I tried to keep my eyelids open, bu in the embraces of my favorite pillows, they slowly drifted down and settled.

* * *

**I got the chapter out within a week! I am proud of myself. Not that this is the most cheery chapter... but all the same! **

**I don't know when I am going to be able to update again, but I will try my best!**

**Anyway... the flashbacks are always the worst. People who have been through these situations and similar ones know what I am talking about. It is like you can't escape them, so you are forced to relive them. **

**Okay so here is this chapter's song!**

**_Let me know that I've done wrong  
When I've known this all along  
I go around a time or two  
Just to waste my time with you_**

**_Tell me all that you've thrown away  
Find out games you don't wanna play  
You are the only one that needs to know_**


End file.
